Quotes about self-esteem

A collection of quotes on the topic of self, self-esteem, people, good.

Quotes about self-esteem

“An individual who has reached the stage of self-esteem almost always makes a sound and rational decision. He or she always sets a reachable yet challenging goal in his or her endeavour. When the endeavour results in a success, his or her self-concept will increase or widen.”

Sukavich Rangsitpol (1935) Thai politician

Education helps reduce social problems and improves quality of life

Self-confidence, Success, Making love, Decision

“Drugs are a waste of time. They destroy your memory and your self-respect and everything that goes along with your self esteem.”

Kurt Cobain (1967–1994) American musician and artist

As quoted in Rolling Stone (1992-04-16).
Interviews (1989-1994), Print
Context: All drugs are a waste of time. They destroy your memory and your self-respect and everything that goes along with your self-esteem. They’re no good at all. But I’m not going to go around preaching against [them].

Memory, Time

“The humble rarely brag about accomplishments because they are typically significant, and their mannerism is one of confidence; but those with low self-esteem have developed a character of conceit and deception. You’re thinking of one now.”

Gandolfo – (RJ Intindola)

1982

Self-confidence, Confidence, Thinking

“Outstanding leaders go out of their way to boost the self esteem of their personnel. If people believe in themselves it s amazing what they can accomplish.”

Sam Walton (1918–1992) Founder of Wal-Mart and Sam's Club

For Team, People, Way

“He who does not travel, who does not read,
who does not listen to music,
who does not find grace in himself,
she who does not find grace in herself,
dies slowly.
He who slowly destroys his own self-esteem,
who does not allow himself to be helped”

Pablo Neruda (1904–1973) Chilean poet

dies slowly… Muere lentamente quien no viaja, quien no lee, quien no oye música, quien no encuentra gracia en sí mismo. Muere lentamente quien destruye su amor propio, quien no se deja ayudar... Poem "Muere lentamente" (Dying Slowly), wrongly attributed to Pablo Neruda. See "Fake Pablo Neruda Poem Spreads on Internet" http://www.laht.com/article.asp?ArticleId=325275&CategoryId=14094 by Ana Mendoza, Latin American Herald Tribune (12 January 2009). Misattributed Source: Selected Poems

Music, Travel, Reading, Help

“One who possesses significant low self-esteem, is more likely to betray you.”

Gandolfo – (RJ Intindola)

1981

“In the eyes of the ego, self-esteem and humility are contradictory. In truth, they are one and the same.”

Eckhart Tolle (1948) German writer

Source: A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose

Truth

“In essence, you are neither inferior nor superior to anyone. True self-esteem and true humility arise out of that realization. In the eyes of the ego, self-esteem and humility are contradictory. In truth, they are one and the same.”

Eckhart Tolle (1948) German writer

Source: A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose

Truth

“Now, what is 'unrighteousness' in practice? It is in practice behavior of a kind disliked by the herd. By calling it unrighteousness, and by arranging an elaborate system of ethics around this conception, the herd justifies itself in wreaking punishment upon the objects of its own dislike, while at the same time, since the herd is righteous by definition, it enhances its own self-esteem at the very moment when it lets loose its impulse to cruelty. This is the psychology of lynching, and of the other ways in which criminals are punished. The essence of the conception of righteousness, therefore, is to afford an outlet for sadism by cloaking cruelty as justice.”

Bertrand Russell (1872–1970) logician, one of the first analytic philosophers and political activist

"The Idea of Righteousness"
1930s, Has Religion Made Useful Contributions to Civilization? (1930)

Justice, Way, Behavior, Time

“There is nothing that so raises a young man's self-esteem, that so contributes to the formation of his character as for him to find himself unexpectedly confronted with a task which he has to accomplish entirely on his own initiative and by his own efforts.”

Stefan Zweig book Beware of Pity

Beware of Pity (1939)

Effort

“The encounter with bureaucracy takes place in a mode of explicit abstraction. … This fact gives rise to a contradiction. The individual expects to be treated “justly.” As we have seen, there is considerable moral investment in this expectation. The expected “just” treatment, however, is possible only if the bureaucracy operates abstractly, and that means it will treat the individual “as a number.” Thus the very “justice” of this treatment entails a depersonalization of each individual case. At least potentially, this constitutes a threat to the individual’s self-esteem and, in the extreme case, to his subjective identity. The degree to which this threat is actually felt will depend on extrinsic factors, such as the influence of culture critics who decry the “alienating” effects of bureaucratic organization. One may safely generalize here that the threat will be felt in direct proportion to the development of individualistic and personalistic values in the consciousness of the individual. Where such values are highly developed, it is likely that the intrinsic abstraction of bureaucracy will be felt as an acute irritation at best or an intolerable oppression at worst. In such cases the “duties” of the bureaucrat collide directly with the “rights” of the client—not, of course, those “rights” that are bureaucratically defined and find their correlates in the “duties” of the bureaucrat, but rather those “rights” that derive from extrabureaucratic values of personal autonomy, dignity and worth. The individual whose allegiance is given to such values is almost certainly going to resent being treated “as a number.””

Peter L. Berger (1929–2017) Austrian-born American sociologist

Source: The Homeless Mind: Modernization and Consciousness (1973), pp. 55-56

Justice, Dependency, Personality

“And I can't even go to the grocery store without some ones that's clean and a shirt with a team/It seems we living the American dream but people highest up got the lowest self esteem/The prettiest people do the ugliest things for the road to riches and diamond rings.”

Kanye West (1977) American rapper, singer and songwriter

All Falls Down
Lyrics, The College Dropout (2004)

People, Dreams

“Consistent failure to attain goals throughout life results in defeatism, low self-esteem or depression.”

Theodore Kaczynski book Industrial Society and Its Future

"The Power Process", item 36
Industrial Society and Its Future (1995)

Life, Failure

“Without the support of your father (practically and metaphysically), without that behind you, without the knowledge of you as both a biological and cultural creature, with that depth of knowledge, you don't have the courage to do it, because you don't know what you are or what you could be. And so without that – because you're a historical creature, so you need all this collected wisdom, and all this dream-like information, and all this mythology and all this narrative, to inform you about what you are beyond what you see of yourself. And you're pummeled down, and people picked on you, and there's fifty things about you that are horrible, and you have a self-esteem problem, and you're sort of hunched over – you've got all these problems, and so it's not easy to see the divinity that lurks behind that. Unless you're aware of the heroic stories of the past – the metaphysics of consciousness – I don't think you can have the courage that regards yourself as the sort of creature that can stand up underneath that intense existential burden and move forward in courage and grace.”

Jordan Peterson (1962) Canadian clinical psychologist, cultural critic, and professor of psychology

Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hdrLQ7DpiWs "Biblical Series II: Genesis 1: Chaos & Order"

Wisdom, People, Dreams, Courage

“I need say hardly anything in the Unintelligence of the Negroes, They show capacities of Providence and they are most likely always having low self-esteem But needless to say my Virtue, Power, And Strength have helped them to become strong most upcoming individuals in the nation they show pride and interest in education and learning new things And Just know What lies with you once lies with you more until change is done.”

Benjamin Rush (1745–1813) American physician, educator, author

Education, Strong, Learning, Change

“There is no doubt that in exchanging a self-centered for a selfless life we gain enormously in self-esteem.”

Eric Hoffer book The True Believer

Section 10
The True Believer (1951), Part One: The Appeal of Mass Movements
Context: There is no doubt that in exchanging a self-centered for a selfless life we gain enormously in self-esteem. The vanity of the selfless, even those who practice utmost humility, is boundless.

Life

“Now I could let these dream killers kill my self esteem,
Or use my arrogance as the steam to power my dreams
I use it as my gas, so they say that I'm gassed
But without it I'd be last, so I ought to laugh.”

Kanye West (1977) American rapper, singer and songwriter

Last Call
Lyrics, The College Dropout (2004)

Dreams

“It seems, we living the American dream
But people highest up got the lowest self esteem.
The prettiest people do the ugliest things
For the road to riches and diamond rings.”

Kanye West (1977) American rapper, singer and songwriter

All Falls Down
Lyrics, The College Dropout (2004)

Dreams, People

“Deficient self-confidence and self respect, develops low self esteem, and induces the need to find faults in others; wisdom and quality self-confidence, engenders one’s ability to find excellence in the traits of others.”

Gandolfo – (RJ Intindola)

1983

Confidence, Self-confidence, Wisdom

“Nothing is better for self-esteem than survival.”

Martha Gellhorn (1908–1998) journalist from the United States

"Travels with Myself and Another: A Memoir" (1978) by Martha Gellhorn.
Source: Travels With Myself and Another

“Self-esteem is the reputation we acquire with ourselves.”

Nathaniel Branden (1930–2014) Canadian–American psychotherapist and writer

Source: Six Pillars of Self-Esteem

“It's that a bit of irreverence is necessary to have any self-esteem at all. Not irreverence for people, but rather, for what other people think.”

Sherry Argov (1977) American writer

Source: Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl—A Woman's Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship

People, Thinking

“Self-esteem can be so exhausting. I want to cut my hair, change my clothes, erase the pimple from the near-tip of my nose, and strengthen my upper-arm definition, all in the next hour.”

David Levithan Boy Meets Boy

Source: Boy Meets Boy

Change, Clothes

“Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.”

George Carlin (1937–2008) American stand-up comedian

Source: Napalm & Silly Putty

People

“The Lord's way builds individual self esteem and develops and heals the dignity of the individual, whereas the world's way depresses the individual's view of himself and causes deep resentment”

Spencer W. Kimball (1895–1985) President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

World, Way

“Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes.”

William Gibson (1948) American-Canadian speculative fiction novelist and founder of the cyberpunk subgenre

Misattributed Source: thought to be Gibson's words as a result of Twitter attribution decay, despite repeated disavowals. https://twitter.com/#!/GreatDismal/status/144940064990961664 https://twitter.com/#!/GreatDismal/status/144941061578559488 https://twitter.com/#!/GreatDismal/status/144941447936884736 https://twitter.com/#!/GreatDismal/status/171091202161131520. The source, according to Gibson, is Steven Winterburn https://twitter.com/greatdismal/status/119133581598666752 https://twitter.com/5tevenw/status/73091190475595776. However, Steven Winterburn is NOT the original creator of that quote. The original quote is the creation of Twitter account holder "@debihope" https://twitter.com/debihope?lang=en. See research by quoteinvestigator http://quoteinvestigator.com/2014/10/25/diagnose/.

Powerful

“No wonder studies show that women's intellectual self-esteem tends to go down as years of education go up. We have been studying our own absence.”

Gloria Steinem (1934) American feminist and journalist

Source: My Life on the Road

Women, Education, Study

“Self-esteem isn't everything; it's just that there's nothing without it.”

Gloria Steinem (1934) American feminist and journalist

“Popcorn for breakfast! Why not? It's a grain. It's like, like, grits, but with high self-esteem.”

James Patterson (1947) American author

Source: The Angel Experiment

“A Mother who radiates self-love and self-acceptance actually VACCINATES her daughter against low self-esteem.”

Naomi Wolf (1962) American writer

Love, Daughters

“Only make decisions that support your self-image, self-esteem, and self-worth.”

Oprah Winfrey (1954) American businesswoman, talk show host, actress, producer, and philanthropist

Support, Decision

“There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self-esteem, the more likely one will be to treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity.”

Nathaniel Branden (1930–2014) Canadian–American psychotherapist and writer

“If we experience any failures or setbacks, we do not forget them because they offend our self-esteem. Instead we reflect on them deeply, trying to figure out what went wrong and discern whether there are any patterns to our mistakes.”

Robert Greene book Mastery

Source: Mastery

Failure, Forgetting

“Disciplining yourself to do what you know is right and importance, although
difficult, is the highroad to pride, self-esteem, and personal satisfaction.”

Brian Tracy (1944) American motivational speaker and writer

Personality

“Your self esteem is like a notch below Kafka's.”

Woody Allen (1935) American screenwriter, director, actor, comedian, author, playwright, and musician

Source: Manhattan

“In order to deal with reality successfully - to pursue and achieve the values which his life requires - man needs self-esteem; he needs to be confident of his efficacy and worth.”

Ayn Rand (1905–1982) Russian-American novelist and philosopher

Source: The Virtue of Selfishness: A New Concept of Egoism

Life, Confidence, Reality

“What is the most important thing one learns in school? Self-esteem, support, and friendship.”

Terry Tempest Williams (1955) American writer

Source: Pieces of White Shell

Friendship, School, Support, Learning

“Self-esteem comes from being able to define the world in your own terms and refusing to abide by the judgments of others.”

Oprah Winfrey (1954) American businesswoman, talk show host, actress, producer, and philanthropist

World

“I do not care to listen; obloquy injures my self-esteem and I am skeptical of praise.”

Jack Vance Dying Earth

Source: Dying Earth (1950-1984), The Eyes of the Overworld (1966), Chapter 1, "The Overworld"

“The answer, then, to the question of who freed the slaves is not the slaves, and not even (as Blight tries to temporize) both the slaves and Lincoln. It was Lincoln's task—and Lincoln did it. This may not work to promote anyone else's self-esteem, but it did wonders for providing freedom.”

Allen C. Guelzo (1953) American historian

2010s, Letter (2010)

Question, Freedom

“"Arrh! Stars and Mud, ever conjugate, a Paradox to consider, — one…for the Astronomer-Royal, perhaps?" His current scheme being, to assail Maskelyne's Sanity, by now and then posing to him Questions that will not bear too much cogitating upon, — most lately, Über Bernouillis Brachistochronsprobleme, 1702 by Baron von Boppdörfer ("Mind like a Spanish Blade. Read it at the Risk of your Self-Esteem.") having almost done the Trick.”

Thomas Pynchon Mason & Dixon

Source: Mason & Dixon (1997), Chapter 74

Star, Question, Reading

“They say the rebels in Iraq still fight for Saddam but that's bullshit. I'll tell you why it's totally wrong. Because if another country invaded the hood tonight it would be warfare through Harlem and Washington Heights. I wouldn't be fighting for Bush or white America's dream. I'd be fighting for my people's survival and self esteem.”

Immortal Technique (1978) American rapper and activist

Bin Laden (2005)
The Martyr, 2011, Singles

People, Dreams, Fight, Country

“I was hanging out the other night with a bunch of friends I've known forever. They were saying, "Look at you. You've grown into a swan." I looked at them and said, "My awkward phase lasted about three years longer than all of yours combined." I related to the physical and emotional awkwardness Mia goes through. She has incredibly low self-esteem. A lot of my life was spent having the same thing, but I'm getting over that now.”

Anne Hathaway (1982) American actress

As quoted in "Anne Hathaway : Royal Role" by Jeffrey Epstein at E! Online (20 July 2001)

Life, Night

“We are incredibly heedless in the formation of our beliefs, but find ourselves filled with an illicit passion for them when anyone proposes to rob us of their companionship. It is obviously not the ideas themselves that are dear to us, but our self-esteem, which is threatened.”

James Harvey Robinson (1863–1936) American historian

The Mind in the Making : The Relation of Intelligence to Social Reform (1921)

Idea, Passion

“Good Lord. I’d be lying if I said I’d never Googled myself, but it honestly never occurred to me to add ‘naked’ to my search criteria. Sure enough, there have been five nude ‘episodes’. And I know this is self-destructive but somehow I find myself on a ‘nudescenes’ forum where linus22 is arguing that I have odd-shaped nipples. Do I? Oh God! That thought never occurred to me! One more for the self-esteem list.”

Alice Evans (1971) British actress

Alice Evans' May 2007 Glamour Magazine column "Do I Dare to Bare".

God, Search, Lying

“People never realize how much work impacts there self esteem and sense of purpose until they leave a job.”

Rob Payne (1973) Canadian writer

Source: Working Class Zero (2003), Chapter 16, p. 127

People, Sense

“In this business one becomes a connoisseur. I can now see that [Jim] Carrey is a virtuoso, [Chris] Farley is at least hard-working, [Adam] Sandler is hopeless and Pauly Shore bypasses all categories to achieve a kind of transcendent fingernails-on-the-blackboard effect. His appeal must be limited to people whose self-esteem and social skills are so damaged that they find humor, or at least relief, in at last encountering a movie character less successful than themselves.”

Roger Ebert (1942–2013) American film critic, author, journalist, and TV presenter

Review http://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/jury-duty-1995 of Jury Duty (12 April 1995) Reviews, One-star reviews

People, Business, Success

“There's a lot of talk these days about giving children self-esteem. It's not something you can give; it's something they have to build. Coach Graham worked in a no-coddling zone. Self-esteem? He knew there was really only one way to teach kids how to develop it; You give them something they can't do, they work hard until they find they can do it, and you just keep repeating the process.”

Randy Pausch book The Last Lecture

Source: The Last Lecture (2008), Chapter 7: I Never Made it in the NFL, pp. 36 - 37

Children, Way

“Carmody’s jaw stiffened and he withdrew his hand. He had been pushed around long enough. Now, for the sake of his own self-esteem, he would not yield any more.”

Robert Sheckley book Dimension of Miracles

Source: Dimension of Miracles (1968), Chapter 4 (p. 31)

“So many people these days, it seemed, believed that these things (personal fulfillment and self-esteem) could come only from work, not from parenting, and many people believed that having children had nothing to do with raising them.”

Nicholas Sparks (1965) American writer and novelist

Taylor McAden, Chapter 18, p. 200
2000s, The Rescue (2000)

Children, People, Parent, Personality

“The appearance in the mind of undesirable and ignoble thoughts, even if they are very fleeting and only half-articulate, has an unpleasant effect upon one’s self-esteem. Therefore such thoughts are often shoved aside, unattended to and unopposed. Often they are also camouflaged by more pleasing and respectable labels which hide their true nature. Thoughts disposed of in either of these two ways will strengthen the accumulated power of ignoble tendencies in the subconscious.”

Nyanaponika Thera (1901–1994) German Buddhist monk

Source: The Vision of Dhamma (1994), p. 79

Way, Nature, Appearance

“Not only was he ignorant, but he had not even those conditions within himself which made knowledge possible. All that there was developed of him, at present, was a fund of energy, self-esteem, hope, courage, and daring, the love of action, life, and adventure; his life was in the outward and present, not in the inward and reflective; he was a true ten-year old boy, in its healthiest and most animal perfection. What she was, the small pearl with the golden hair, with her frail and high-strung organization, her sensitive nerves, her half-spiritual fibres, her ponderings, and marvels, and dreams, her power of love, and yearning for self-devotion, our readers may, perhaps, have seen. But if ever two children, or two grown people, thus organized, are thrown into intimate relations, it follows, from the very laws of their being, that one must hurt the other, simply by being itself; one must always hunger for what the other has not to give.”

Harriet Beecher Stowe (1811–1896) Abolitionist, author

The Pearl of Orr's Island : A Story of the Coast of Maine (1862) Online scans http://www.hti.umich.edu/cgi/t/text/text-idx?c=moa&idno=AAN5549.0001.001&view=toc at the Making of America project.

Love, Life, Hunger, Children

“I hear sometimes of the necessity for creating an "international mind." I am afraid that my heart is too stubbornly local for me to follow that high thought… I am an impenitent patriot; like Gilbert's heroic figure, "I remain an Englishman." I do not want daily to become more and more like my neighbour, nor would it gratify my self-esteem if he became daily more like me.”

Stanley Baldwin (1867–1947) Former Prime Minister of the United Kingdom

Speech to the Peace Society (31 October 1935), quoted in This Torch of Freedom (1935), p. 332.
1935

Heart

“I’ve learned from these events that self-esteem plays as much a part in the destiny of nations as it does in the lives of individuals; that self-hatred leads to the need either to dominate or to be dominated; that citizens who refuse to obey anything but their own conscience can transform their countries; in short, that self-esteem is the basis of any real democracy.”

Gloria Steinem (1934) American feminist and journalist

Revolution From Within

Democracy, Learning, Parting, Country

“My most coveted thing is a high self-esteem, and a low tolerance for them telling me how to lean,
see the most important parts are the ones that are unseen, cause the wings don't make you fly
and the crown don't make you king”

Lupe Fiasco (1982) rapper

"Gold Watch"
Albums, Lupe Fiasco's The Cool (2007)

Parting, Flying

“I have travelled across the length and breadth of India and I have not seen one person who is a beggar, who is a thief. Such wealth I have seen in the country, such high moral values, people of such caliber, that I do not think we would conquer this country, unless we break the very backbone of this nation, which is her spiritual and cultural heritage, and therefore, I propose that we replace her old and ancient education system, her culture, for if the Indians think that all that is foreign and English is good and greater than their own, they will lose their self esteem, their native culture and they will become what we want them, a truly dominated nation.”

Thomas Babington Macaulay, 1st Baron Macaulay (1800–1859) British historian and Whig politician

This quotation is commonly said to have been spoken by Macaulay during a speech to the British Parliament in 1835. Since Macaulay was in India at the time, it is more likely to have come from his Minute on Indian Education http://www.columbia.edu/itc/mealac/pritchett/00generallinks/macaulay/txt_minute_education_1835.html. However, these words do not appear in that text. According to Koenraad Elst http://koenraadelst.bharatvani.org/articles/hinduism/macaulay.html, these words were printed in The Awakening Ray, Vol. 4, No. 5, published by the Gnostic Center, preceded by: "His words were to the effect." Burjor Avari cites this misattribution as an example of "tampering with historical evidence" in India: The Ancient Past ISBN 9780415356169, pp. 19–20), writes: "No proof of this statement has been found in any of the volumes containing the writings and speeches of Macaulay. In a journal in which the extract appeared, the writer did not reproduce the exact wording of the Minutes, but merely paraphrased them, using the qualifying phrase: ‘His words were to the effect.:’ This is extremely mischievous, as numerous interpretations can be drawn from the Minutes." For a full discussion, see Koenraad Elst, The Argumentative Hindu (2012) Chapter 3 Misattributed

People, Education, Travel, Thinking

“Most persons with an autism-spectrum disorder have never expressed their opinions on someone’s blog and never will. The neurodiverse often reach a vulnerable audience, as many persons on the spectrum have low self-esteem. Neurodiversity provides a tempting escape valve.”

Jonathan Mitchell (1955) American writer and activist

Neurodiversity: Just Say No

Personality

“Our self-esteem and conceit are European, but our culture and actions are Asiatic.”

Anton Chekhov (1860–1904) Russian dramatist, author and physician

Note-Book of Anton Chekhov (1921)

“The first act of violence that patriarchy demands of males is not violence toward women. Instead patriarchy demands of all males that they engage in acts of psychic self-mutilation, that they kill off the emotional parts of themselves. If an individual is not successful in emotionally crippling himself, he can count on patriarchal men to enact rituals of power that will assault his self-esteem.”

Bell Hooks (1952) American author, feminist, and social activist

The Will To Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love (2004), p. 66

Men, Success, Parting

“Fearing discovery of their “fraudulence,” they burden themselves with too much work to compensate for their lack of self-esteem and identity. Work/life balance is a meaningless concept to them.”

Manfred F.R. Kets de Vries (1942) Dutch academic

The Dangers of Feeling Like a Fake, 2005

Life, Fear

“World views, as related to the sciences, ethics, arts, politics and religions, are integral parts of all cultures. They have a strongly motivating and inspiring function. A socially shared view of the whole gives a culture a sense of direction, confidence and self-esteem. Moreover, interactions between cultures change constantly.”

Diederik Aerts (1953) Belgian theoretical physicist

Source: World views. From Fragmentation to Integration (1994), p. 8

World, Religion, Art, Confidence

“Henceforth, there is to be no testing oneself against the best, with the possibility, even the likelihood, of failure: instead, one is perpetually to immerse oneself in the tepid bath of self-esteem, mutual congratulation, and benevolence toward all.”

Theodore Dalrymple (1949) English doctor and writer

The Rage of Virginia Woolf http://www.city-journal.org/html/12_3_oh_to_be.html (Summer 2002). City Journal (1998 - 2008)

Failure

“I was the worst, most sickly kid of all – 30 pounds underweight. The girls used to beat me up. Actually I was a mean kid, early on because I had no self-esteem.”

Jack LaLanne (1914–2011) American exercise instructor

In "Live Young Forever: 12 Steps to Optimum Health, Fitness and Longevity", p. 10

Girl

“Lack of confidence leads us into the dark waters of envy. We see men are functioning without hang-ups—and like girls who envy the unfettered freedom of older brothers, we find it easier to focus on how "lucky" the men are and how "unlucky" we are. Sequestered in an unfair situation, we don't have to do anything about achieving the competence and self-esteem we so admire in others.”

Colette Dowling (1938)

Source: The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence (1981), p. 128

Men, Confidence, Girl, Freedom

“We want to be able to freely associate, without fear that our privacy, including the privacy of our intimate consensual relations, will be compromised by intrusive and abusive selective enforcement of laws or moral codes.
We want to be able to live with the person we choose in legally sanctioned arrangements or marriage, to be able to build and maintain families and raise children, with the full protections and benefits that attain to those relationships.
We want GLBT youth to have access to safe and inclusive education experiences, in both public and private educational institutions, no longer dispirited by judgmental, prejudicial systems that contribute to low self-esteem and leave them at risk. These are the basic rights and expectations yet to be achieved for GLBT people in this land of the free.”

Jeffrey Montgomery (1953–2016) American LGBT rights activist and public relations executive

America...You Kill Me

Marriage, Children, People, Youth

“…the position of the body significantly influences the emotions and sensations during the desired stage of hypnotism; also, whatever the passion which one wants to express by the attitude of the patient, when the muscles necessary to this expression are brought into play, the passion itself bursts forth suddenly and the whole organism responds accordingly. The upright body, the expanded chest, the contracted extensors, all that suggests the feeling of self-esteem, self-determination, resolve and unconquerable pride. As soon as one decreases the contraction of these muscles, that gives to the patient a depressed attitude, with a sunken chest, the expression of the features changes in a very manifest way, the voice and the whole manner of being of the individual now express humility, abasement and pity.”

James Braid (1795–1860) Scottish surgeon, hypnotist, and hypnotherapist

Original Philosophy of Hypnotism The International College of Hypnosis & Hypnotherapy

Way, Feeling, Passion, Change

“Not every article in every magazine or newspaper is meant to be a valentine card addressed to every reader's self-esteem.”

Rex Murphy (1947) Canadian journalist

On a complaint against an "Islamaphobic" article in a Canadian magazine 2008 (http://www.cbc.ca/national/blog/video/rex_murphy/human_rights_gone_awry.html)

“Donald Conroy is the only person I have ever known whose self-esteem was absolutely unassailable. There was not one thing about himself that my father did not like, nor was there one thing about himself that he would change. He simply adored the man he was and walked with perfect confidence through every encounter in his life. Dad wished everyone could be just like him. His stubbornness was an art form. The Great Santini did what he did, when he wanted to do it, and woe to the man who got in his way. Once I introduced my father before he gave a speech to an Atlanta audience. I said at the end of the introduction, "My father decided to go into the Marine Corps on the day he discovered his IQ was the temperature of this room."”

Pat Conroy (1945–2016) American novelist

My father rose to the podium, stared down at the audience, and said without skipping a beat, "My God, it's hot in here! It must be at least 180 degrees".
Eulogy for a Fighter Pilot (1998)

Life, God, Art, Way

“An evolving discipline–whether it be history or economics or astrophysics or immunology–is ever dynamically changing. Two steps forward and X steps back, so to speak. Periodically, the scholarly group registers more or less self-confidence, self-esteem, and complacency. We careerists are happiest when recent past achievements have seemed to be successful, but when still there are completable tasks dimly visible ahead.”

Paul A. Samuelson (1915–2009) American economist

"Foreword: Eavesdropping on the Future?" in New Frontiers in Economics (2004)
New millennium

Confidence, History, Change, Success

“It would be hard to name a more certain sign of poor self-esteem than the need to perceive some other group as inferior.”

Nathaniel Branden (1930–2014) Canadian–American psychotherapist and writer

The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem (1994)

“My mentor continued: Selflessness doesn’t mean to give up pursuing adventurous goals, but rather to attach ourselves to transcendental goals. Actual selflessness means we must genuinely access humility and submissiveness. This can be very scary, because we normally identify humility and submissiveness with low self esteem.”

Bhakti Tirtha Swami (1950–2005) American Hindu writer

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Books, The Beggar, Volume III: False Ego: The Greatest Enemy of the Spiritual Leader (Hari-Nama Press, 2002)

“The courtly person (cortegiano, gentilhomme, gentleman, Hofmann) has gone through a training in self-esteem that expresses itself in many ways: in aristocratically pretentious opinions, in polished or majestic manners, in gallant or heroic patterns of feeling as well as in a selective, aesthetic sensitivity for that which is said to be courtly or pretty. The noble, far removed from any self-doubt, should achieve all this with a complete matter-of-factness. Any uncertainty, any doubt in these things signifies a slackening in the nobility’s cultural “identity.” This class narcissism, which has petrified into a form of life, tolerates no irony, no exception, no slips, because such disturbances would give rise to unwelcome reflections. The French nobles did not turn up their noses at Shakespeare’s “barbarism” without reason. In his plays one already “smells” the human ordinariness of those who want to stand before society as the best.
With the ascendancy of the bourgeoisie, the place of the “best” is awarded anew. The bourgeois ego, in an unprecedented, creative storming to the heights of a new class consciousness won for itself an autonomous narcissism.”

Peter Sloterdijk (1947) German philosopher

Source: Kritik der zynischen Vernunft [Critique of Cynical Reason] (1983), p. 62

Life, Way, Feeling, Personality

“In fact, at this point in history, the most radical, pervasive, and earth-shaking transformation would occur simply if everybody truly evolved to a mature, rational, and responsible ego, capable of freely participating in the open exchange of mutual self-esteem.. There is the "edge of history."”

Ken Wilber (1949) American writer and public speaker

There would be a real New Age.
Up From Eden (1981)

Age, History

“Imagine each family as a kind of little factory--a multiperson unit producing meals, health, skills, children, and self-esteem from market goods and the time, skills, and knowledge of its members. This is only one of the remarkable concepts explored by Gary Becker in his landmark work on the family. Becker applies economic theory to the most sensitive and fateful personal decisions, such as choosing a spouse or having children. He uses the basic economic assumptions of maximizing behavior, stable preferences, arid equilibria in explicit or implicit markets to analyze the allocation of time to child care as well as to careers, to marriage and divorce in polygynous as well as monogamous societies, to the increase and decrease of wealth from one generation to another.”

Gary S. Becker book A Treatise on the Family

Book abstract 2009
A Treatise on the Family, 1981

Fate, Marriage, Children, Health

“Geology has joined biology in lowering mankind's self-esteem. Geology suggests how mankind's existence is contingent upon the geological consent of the planet.”

George Will (1941) American newspaper columnist, journalist, and author

from a review of Simon Winchester’s Krakatoa (2003), as quoted in The Oxford Dictionary of American Quotations (rev. 2005), ed. Rawson & Miner, Oxford University Press, p. 600: ISBN 0195168232
2000s

“What is greatness? I will answer: it is the capacity to live by the three fundamental values of John Galt: reason, purpose, self-esteem.”

Ayn Rand (1905–1982) Russian-American novelist and philosopher

Playboy Interview (March 1964)

“Art is man’s metaphysical mirror; what a rational man seeks to see in that mirror is a salute; what an irrational man seeks to see is a justification – even if only a justification of his depravity, as a last convulsion of his betrayed self-esteem.”

Ayn Rand book The Romantic Manifesto

Source: The Romantic Manifesto (1969), Chapter 3 ("Art and Sense of Life")

Art

“We have to adjust ourselves, and every radical adjustment is a crisis in self-esteem: we undergo a test, we have to prove ourselves.”

Eric Hoffer (1898–1983) American philosopher

Ch. 1: "Drastic Change" http://books.google.com/books?id=7Y-NoJ8yNIkC&q=%22every+radical+adjustment+is+a+crisis+in+self-esteem%22&pg=PA3#v=onepage The Ordeal of Change (1963)

“Strange and predatory and truly dangerous, car thieves and muggers—they seem to jeopardize all our cherished concepts, even our self-esteem, our property rights, our powers of love, our laws and pleasures. The only relationship we seem to have with them is scorn or bewilderment, but they belong somewhere on the dark prairies of a country that is in the throes of self-discovery.”

John Cheever (1912–1982) American novelist and short story writer

The Late Forties and the Fifties, 1955 entry.
The Journals of John Cheever (1991)

Love, Pleasure, Law, Cars

“Capitalism is based on self-interest and self-esteem; it holds integrity and trustworthiness as cardinal virtues and makes them pay off in the marketplace, thus demanding that men survive by means of virtue, not vices. It is this superlatively moral system that the welfare statists propose to improve upon by means of preventative law, snooping bureaucrats, and the chronic goad of fear.”

Alan Greenspan (1926) 13th Chairman of the Federal Reserve in the United States

The Assault on Integrity http://homepage.mac.com/tomdalekeever/greenspanintegrity.html 1963 1950–60s

Men, Fear, Law

“I don't think it's a good attitude in your life to feel that you have to be rich to have self-esteem. You know, I saw a billboard in New York I wish I had photographed. It was for the TNN network. It said three words against a patriotic background of red, white and blue — BIGGER, YOUNGER, RICHER. Now, I find that fascinating: 'Bigger, younger, richer.' This whole idea of being wealthy has gone too far. I never ride in a limousine, you know. I feel gross if I get in a limousine. One good thing about the sixties was it sort of was the opposite back then. You looked silly trying to appear rich.”

Tom Petty (1950–2017) American musician

Rolling Stone interview (2002)

Life, Feeling, Idea, Thinking

“Giving people a sense of significance is the best motivation, the best way to get people fired up about their jobs, their company the contributions they can make. Find little ways of impacting people’s self-esteem, and get out of their way. Then watch as they get the job done and do so with an attitude of pride to be part of the team.”

Don Soderquist (1934–2016)

Don Soderquist “ The Wal-Mart Way: The Inside Story of the Success of the World's Largest Company https://books.google.com/books?id=mIxwVLXdyjQC&lpg=PR9&dq=Don%20Soderquist&pg=PR9#v=onepage&q=Don%20Soderquist&f=false, Thomas Nelson, April 2005, p. 56. On Creating Teamwork

People, Way, Motivation, Sense

“If you read some of the Parisian newspapers, among others the 'Figaro', so beloved of the right-thinking public, you must have learned that I am part of a group of artists who opened a private exhibition [in the art-gallery of Durand-Ruel in Paris, April 1876]. You must also have seen what favour this exhibition enjoys in the eyes of these gentlemen [Berthe refers to the critical articles in Paris with all their mockery about her works]. On the other hand, we have been praised in the radical newspaper, but you don't read those [her aunts]! Well, at least we are getting attention, and we have enough self-esteem not to care. My brother-in-law Edouard Manet is not with us [Manet didn't participate in this first Impressionist show, initiated by Degas ]. Speaking of success, he [Manet] has just been rejected by the Salon; he, too, is perfectly good-humored about his failure.”

Berthe Morisot (1841–1895) painter from France

In a letter to her aunts, 1876; as quoted in The Private Lives of the Impressionists, Sue Roe; Harper Collins Publishers, New York, 2006, p. 155
Berthe wrote this letter after the second Impressionist exhibition of April 1876 where she was participating with 19 pictures (Monet with 18!)
1871 - 1880

Law, Art, Failure, Thinking

“How to value my own self-esteem more than the praise of others.”

Frank Crane (1861–1928) American Presbyterian minister

Four Minute Essays Vol. 7 (1919), A School for Living

“Eric's not retiring from television entirely, but only from daily journalism, and that means, of course, this broadcast. It's not only his beautifully-chosen words of wisdom that we shall miss — to this newsman, he's one of the finest essayists of this century — but we shall also miss our almost daily contacts with him in the pursuit of our craft, in which his rare insight and unswerving integrity were a constant source of professional guidance. And yes, it's also true that we shall be the poorer in our self-esteem for no longer being able to call him "colleague," but that's the way it is: Wednesday, November 30, 1977. This is Walter Cronkite, CBS News; good night.”

Walter Cronkite (1916–2009) American broadcast journalist

On Eric Sevareid's retirement (1977)

Wisdom, Way, Night

“Having an interest in clothes is a sign of vanity and English men don't like to be seen to be vain. That's what is so fantastic about this format, it gives men permission to take an interest in clothes and their appearance. And as a result their self-esteem goes up.”

Trinny Woodall (1964) English fashion advisor and designer, television presenter and author

Regarding Trinny & Susannah Undress...; as quoted in "Laid Bare" by Nicola Methven in The Daily Mirror http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/topstories/tm_objectid=17846372&method=full&siteid=94762&headline=laid-bare-name_page.html (30 September 2006)

Men, Appearance, Clothes

“Honor is self-esteem made visible in action.”

Ayn Rand (1905–1982) Russian-American novelist and philosopher

The Ayn Rand Letter (1971–1976)

“People with healthy self-esteem do not need to create pretend identities.”

Bell Hooks (1952) American author, feminist, and social activist

Rock My Soul (2003)

People