Quotes about selfishness
page 4

William Howitt photo
Pope Benedict XVI photo
Nathaniel Hawthorne photo
Letitia Elizabeth Landon photo
Albert Pike photo

“I have frequently had men describe the following scenario to me: "If at the beginning of a relationship, I keep the woman at a distance and don't want to get too close, she feels that I am pushing her away and that I am not making a commitment—that I am afraid to be intimate. When I finally let down my guard and try to be intimate and close, when I really make myself vulnerable and give up control, which is uncomfortable for me, then I feel really inadequate. She blames me for things that she never blamed me for when I kept my distance. When I start to get close, that's when I am accused of saying the wrong thing or trying to control her. So I am better off staying at a distance and letting her complain about a lack of intimacy."Stewart, age thirty-six, described it this way: "Maryann was liberated on the surface, but the undertow was very different. I would find out a couple of evenings after I had been with her that she was very angry and I wouldn't even know that I had done something wrong. She would be angry because she said I wasn't really involved enough. I didn't care enough about her. The irony is that the women in my life whom I've made the greatest effort to get close to are the ones who always wind up saying they are angry because I wasn't getting close. When I made no effort to get close and really kept my distance, I never got any complaints. The moment I felt I was really opening myself up to be intimate, that was when I was found to be failing. That is the double bind for me."Another such truth was experienced by Alex. He said, "If you keep the control, the distance, then the woman is kept insecure; and so long as she is insecure about the relationship, she will be less inclined to attack. If she's interested in you, but you keep her at a distance, she will be careful about attacking you. She won't criticize you because she's afraid of you. The moment you cross the barrier and actually start to get committed, you find that she begins to feel that you are inadequate as a partner. You know then and there that you are never going to be able to satisfy her."I found this to be true sexually. At the times when I personally thought I was the most sensitive and the most involved and caring as a lover, I would find out often that I was a failure. At the times when I allowed myself to be totally selfish, without apology and didn't give one thought to what the woman experienced, I never got any complaints. I was never told I was selfish as a lover. In fact, I was often told that I was wonderful."”

Herb Goldberg (1937–2019) American psychologist

Why men and women can't talk to each other: the hidden unconscious messages of gender, pp. 39–40
The Inner Male (1987)

John Adams photo
T.S. Eliot photo
Morarji Desai photo

“Consideration for other persons or for other living beings is very vital for goodness and want of consideration for other people makes human beings selfish, regardless for other people's good.”

Morarji Desai (1896–1995) Former Indian Finance Minister, Freedom Fighters, Former prime minister

19th World Vegetarian Congress 1967

Woodrow Wilson photo
Stanley Baldwin photo
George Mason photo

“It is absurd to suppose, if this is God’s world, that men must always be selfish barbarians.”

Charles Fletcher Dole (1845–1927) Unitarian minister, speaker, and writer

The Coming People (1897).

Marcus Tullius Cicero photo

“Should they answer that, if impunity were assured, they would do what was most to their selfish interest, that would be a confession that they were criminally minded; should they say that they would not do so, they would be granting that all things in and of themselves immoral should be avoided.”
Si responderint se impunitate proposita facturos, quod expediat, facinorosos se esse fateantur, si negent, omnia turpia per se ipsa fugienda esse concedant.

Marcus Tullius Cicero (-106–-43 BC) Roman philosopher and statesman

Book III, section 39; translated by Walter Miller
De Officiis – On Duties (44 BC)

Jonathan Edwards photo
Konstantin Tsiolkovsky photo

“translation: Ethics of the Cosmos, ie. its conscious creatures means that there shouldn't be any suffering anywhere: neither for perfected nor for other immature ones or ones that are starting their development. It is an expression of pure selfishness (egoism). If there will be no ordeals or nuisances in the Universe, not even one atom will be a part of an imperfect, suffering or criminal organism.”

Konstantin Tsiolkovsky (1857–1935) Russian and Soviet rocket scientist and pioneer of the astronautic theory

Этика космоса, т.е. ее сознательных существ состоит в том, чтобы не было нигде никаких страданий: ни для совершенных, ни для других недозрелых или начинающих своё развитие животных. Это есть выражение чистейшего себялюбия (эгоизма). Ведь если во вселенной не будет мук и неприятностей, то ни один ее атом не попадёт в несовершенный страдальческий или преступный организм.
from Научная этика http://tsiolkovsky.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Nauchnaya-etika.pdf

Ralph Waldo Emerson photo
James K. Polk photo

“There is more selfishness and less principle among members of Congress, as well as others, than I had any conception [of], before I became President of the U. S.”

James K. Polk (1795–1849) American politician, 11th President of the United States (in office from 1845 to 1849)

Diary entry (16 December 1846).

Theodore Roszak photo
Stephen King photo
Vladimir Lenin photo
Richard Cobden photo
Lydia Maria Child photo
Hermann Rauschning photo
Sören Kierkegaard photo

“This is the truth of the matter. In every human being there is a capacity, the capacity for knowledge. And every person - the most knowing and the most limited - is in his knowledge far beyond what he is in his life or what his life expresses. Yet this misrelation is of little concern to us. On the contrary, we set a high price on knowledge, and everyone strives for this knowledge more and more. "But," says the sensible person, "one must be careful about the direction one's knowing takes. If my knowing turns inward, against me, if I do not take care to prevent this, then knowing is the most intoxicating thing there is, the way to become completely intoxicated, since there then occurs an intoxicating confusion between the knowledge and the knower, so that the knower himself will resemble, will be, that which is known. If your knowing takes such a turn and you yield to it, it will soon end with your tumbling like a drunk man into actuality, plunging yourself recklessly into drunken action without giving the understanding and sagacity the time to take into proper consideration what is prudent, what is advantageous, what will pay. This is why we, the sober ones, warn you, not against knowing or against expanding your knowledge, but against letting your knowledge take an inward direction, for then it is intoxicating." This is thieves' jargon. It says that it is one's knowledge that, by taking the inward direction in this way, intoxicates, rather than that in precisely this way it makes manifest that one is intoxicated, intoxicated in one's attachment to this earthly life, the temporal, the secular, and the selfish. And this is what one fears, fears that one's knowing, turned inward, toward oneself, will expose the intoxication there, will expose that one prefers to remain in this state, will wrench one out of this state and as a result of such a step will make it impossible for one to slip back into that adored state, into intoxication. p. 118”

Sören Kierkegaard (1813–1855) Danish philosopher and theologian, founder of Existentialism

1850s, Judge For Yourselves! 1851 (1876)

Ralph Waldo Emerson photo
Chris Cornell photo

“I was depressed for a long time. If you’re depressed long enough, it’s almost a comfort, a state of mind that you’ve made peace with because you’ve been in it so long. It’s a very selfish world.”

Chris Cornell (1964–2017) American singer-songwriter, musician

Interview with Men's Health magazine, September 2006 https://www.menshealth.com/guy-wisdom/chris-cornell-death-depression-suicide-interview,
On depression and suicide

African Spir photo
Frans de Waal photo

“I think if we study the primates, we notice that a lot of these things that we value in ourselves, such as human morality, have a connection with primate behavior. This completely changes the perspective, if you start thinking that actually we tap into our biological resources to become moral beings. That gives a completely different view of ourselves than this nasty selfish-gene type view that has been promoted for the last 25 years.”

Frans de Waal (1948) Dutch primatologist and ethologist

Frans de Waal, in a NOVA interview, " The Bonobo in All of Us" PBS (1 January 2007) http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/nature/bonobo-all-us.html; quotes from this interview were for some time misplaced on this page, which probably generated similar misattributions elsewhere, and the misplacement was not discovered until after this quotation had been selected for Quote of the Day, as a quote of Goodall. Corrections were subsequently made here, during the day the quote was posted as QOTD.
The Bonobo in All of Us (2007)

İsmail Enver photo
Adele (singer) photo
Letitia Elizabeth Landon photo

“Selfishness is hypocritical by nature, and seizes on the first decent excuse as a cloak;”

Letitia Elizabeth Landon (1802–1838) English poet and novelist

Traits and Trials of Early Life (1836)

David Myatt photo

“For nearly four decades I placed some ideation, some ideal, some abstraction, before personal love, foolishly - inhumanly - believing that some cause, some goal, some ideology, was the most important thing and therefore that, in the interests of achieving that cause, that goal, implementing that ideology, one's own personal life, one's feelings, and those of others, should and must come at least second if not further down in some lifeless manufactured schemata. My pursuit of such things - often by violent means and by incitement to violence and to disaffection - led, of course, not only to me being the cause of suffering to other human beings I did not personally know but also to being the cause of suffering to people I did know; to family, to friends, and especially to those - wives, partners, lovers - who for some reason loved me. In effect I was selfish, obsessed, a fanatic, an extremist. Naturally, as extremists always do, I made excuses - to others, to myself - for my unfeeling, suffering-causing, intolerant, violent, behaviour and actions; always believing that 'I could make a difference' and always blaming some-thing else, or someone else, for the problems I alleged existed 'in the world' and which problems I claimed, I felt, I believed, needed to be sorted out […] Yet the honest, the obvious, truth was that I - and people like me or those who supported, followed, or were incited, inspired, by people like me - were and are the problem.”

David Myatt (1950) British writer

Source: Letter To My Undiscovered Self (2012) http://www.davidmyatt.info/letter-to-self.html

Niranjanananda Saraswati photo

“As we disassociate ourselves more and more from result and expectations from our work and other selfish attitudes, we identify with our creative nature, with peace within and we attain serenity.”

Niranjanananda Saraswati (1960) Hindu guru, successor of Paramahamsa Satyananda

Source: Swami Sivananda's 18 ITITES and the practice of Prayahara, book by Swami Sivamurti – Yoga Publication Trust, Bihar, India (2013)

Henry Suso photo
Sri Aurobindo photo

“Our actual enemy is not any force exterior to ourselves, but our own crying weaknesses, our cowardice, our selfishness, our hypocrisy, our purblind sentimentalism.”

Sri Aurobindo (1872–1950) Indian nationalist, freedom fighter, philosopher, yogi, guru and poet

21 August 1893
New Lamps for Old (1893)

Peter Greenaway photo
Letitia Elizabeth Landon photo
Syama Prasad Mookerjee photo
William Ewart Gladstone photo
Koichi Tohei photo
Orson Scott Card photo
Yane Sandanski photo

“The future life of small nations doesn't have any conditions. Bulgaria and Serbia did wrong because they followed their own interests. Their main goal wasn't freedom for this people here, but their selfish interests, expanding of their states. After these events, they would stay where they are, and we would make a fatherland here.”

Yane Sandanski (1872–1915) Bulgarian revolutionary

"Interview with Jane Sandanski by Branislav Nusic," in 'Politika', 1908, Belgrade; Translated in: macedoniantruth.org http://www.macedoniantruth.org/forum/showthread.php?t=2005&page=5, 11-13-2011, 06:21 AM

Thomas Kettle photo
Herbert Read photo

“Why do we forget our childhood? With rare exceptions we have no memory of our first four, five, or six years, and yet we have only to watch the development of our own children during this period to realize that these are precisely the most exciting, the most formative years of life. Schachtel’s theory is that our infantile experiences, so free, so uninhibited, are suppressed because they are incompatible with the conventions of an adult society which we call ‘civilized’. The infant is a savage and must be tamed, domesticated. The process is so gradual and so universal that only exceptionally will an individual child escape it, to become perhaps a genius, perhaps the selfish individual we call a criminal. The significance of this theory for the problem of sincerity in art (and in life) is that occasionally the veil of forgetfulness that hides our infant years is lifted and then we recover all the force and vitality that distinguished our first experiences—the ‘celestial joys’ of which Traherne speaks, when the eyes feast for the first time and insatiably on the beauties of God’s creation. Those childhood experiences, when we ‘enjoy the World aright’, are indeed sincere, and we may therefore say that we too are sincere when in later years we are able to recall these innocent sensations.”

Herbert Read (1893–1968) English anarchist, poet, and critic of literature and art

Source: Collected Poems (1966), pp. 16-17

Steven Pinker photo
Sören Kierkegaard photo
Frank Buchman photo

“Either we sacrifice our national selfishness for the good of humanity, or we sacrifice the good of humanity to our national selfishness.”

Frank Buchman (1878–1961) Evangelical theologist

The Revolutionary Path, by Frank Buchman, publisher: Grosvenor Books, 1975, p.23
Quotes on the war of ideas

James Freeman Clarke photo

“How can the human race, whether for selfish or more cosmopolitan ends, understand and control the seemingly blind forces of history?”

Robert Gilpin (1930–2018) Political scientist

p, 125
War and Change in World Politics (1981)

Van Morrison photo

“Someone to hold onto
And keep me from all fear
Someone to be my guiding light
And keep me ever dear
To keep me from my selfishness
To keep me from my sorrow
To lead me on to givingness
So I can see a new tomorrow.”

Van Morrison (1945) Northern Irish singer-songwriter and musician

If I Ever Needed Someone
Song lyrics, His Band and the Street Choir (1970)

Jean de La Bruyère photo
Paul Carus photo

“Every man has his own reason for every deed. Usually it is selfish.”

Source: Drenai series, Quest for Lost Heroes, Ch. 10

Max Stirner photo
Howard Bloom photo
John Von Neumann photo

“It is just as foolish to complain that people are selfish and treacherous as it is to complain that the magnetic field does not increase unless the electric field has a curl. Both are laws of nature.”

John Von Neumann (1903–1957) Hungarian-American mathematician and polymath

As quoted "John von Neumann (1903 - 1957)" by Eugene Wigner, in Year book of the American Philosophical Society (1958); later in Symmetries and Reflections : Scientific Essays of Eugene P. Wigner (1967), p. 261

Houston Stewart Chamberlain photo
T. B. Joshua photo

“If your actions are motivated by selfish interests rather than God, you are mortgaging tomorrow's joy.”

T. B. Joshua (1963) Nigerian Christian leader

On the 2007 Nigerian Elections - "Selfless Service" http://www.modernghana.com/newsthread2/219944/1/ Modern Ghana (May 28 2009)

Meister Eckhart photo
Harry Furniss photo
D.H. Lawrence photo

“California is a queer place — in a way, it has turned its back on the world, and looks into the void Pacific. It is absolutely selfish, very empty, but not false, and at least, not full of false effort.”

D.H. Lawrence (1885–1930) English novelist, poet, playwright, essayist, literary critic and painter

Letter (September 24, 1923); published in The Letters of D.H. Lawrence, James T. Boulton, E. Mansfield, and W. Roberts (1987), vol. 4.

David Foster Wallace photo
John Updike photo

“The yearning for an afterlife is the opposite of selfish: it is love and praise for the world that we are privileged, in this complex interval of light, to witness and experience.”

John Updike (1932–2009) American novelist, poet, short story writer, art critic, and literary critic

Source: Self-Consciousness : Memoirs (1989), Ch. 6

Honoré de Balzac photo

“Courtesy is only a thin veneer on the general selfishness.”

Honoré de Balzac (1799–1850) French writer

La politesse cache très-imparfaitement l’égoïsme général.
Part I, ch. VII.
Letters of Two Brides (1841-1842)

Clement Attlee photo
William Hazlitt photo

“There is not a more mean, stupid, dastardly, pitiful, selfish, spiteful, envious, ungrateful animal than the Public. It is the greatest of cowards, for it is afraid of itself.”

William Hazlitt (1778–1830) English writer

"On Living to One's-Self"
Table Talk: Essays On Men And Manners http://www.blupete.com/Literature/Essays/TableHazIV.htm (1821-1822)

David Graeber photo
Henry Newbolt photo

“And it's not for the sake of a ribboned coat,
Or the selfish hope of a season's fame,
But his Captain's hand on his shoulder smote --
'Play up! play up! and play the game!”

Henry Newbolt (1862–1938) English poet and writer

Describing a game of cricket.
Vitai Lampada http://net.lib.byu.edu/english/wwi/influences/vitai.html

Roy A. Childs, Jr. photo
Erich Fromm photo

“Selfish persons are incapable of loving others, but they are not capable of loving themselves either.”

Erich Fromm (1900–1980) German social psychologist and psychoanalyst

Source: Man for Himself (1947), Ch. 4

Hazrat Inayat Khan photo
Margaret Sullavan photo
David Foster Wallace photo

“Can the decision to be less selfish ever be anything other than a selfish decision?”

David Foster Wallace (1962–2008) American fiction writer and essayist

Consider The Lobster
Essays

African Spir photo
Machado de Assis photo

“Besides, I like epitaphs. Among civilized people they're an expression of that pious and secret selfishness that induces us to pull out of death a shred at least of the shade that has passed on.”

Machado de Assis (1839–1908) Brazilian writer

Gosto dos epitáfios; eles são, entre a gente civilizada, uma expressão daquele pio e secreto egoísmo que induz o homem a arrancar à morte um farrapo ao menos da sombra que passou.
Source: As Memórias Póstumas de Brás Cubas (1881), Ch. 151, p. 196.

Henry Ford photo

“Money doesn't change men. It merely unmasks them. If a man is naturally selfish, or arrogant, or greedy, the money brings it out; that's all.”

Henry Ford (1863–1947) American industrialist

Interview with Bruce Barton, "It Would Be Fun To Start Over Again," The American Magazine, April 1921

John Edwards photo

“I think that Jesus would be disappointed in our ignoring the plight of those around us who are suffering and our focus on our own selfish short-term needs. I think he would be appalled, actually.”

John Edwards (1953) American politician

An interview with the website Beliefnet.com http://www.beliefnet.com/story/213/story_21312_1.html. Reported also by Boston Globe, March 5, 2007. http://www.boston.com/news/nation/articles/2007/03/05/edwards_jesus_would_be_appalled/

Yoshida Shoin photo
Richard Dawkins photo
Dennis Miller photo

“Hey folks, tonight I wanna talk about global warming. Now, The World is Hot and Flat Society is growing increasingly hysterical and that indeed is causing me to sweat a little. In the last month or so, I've heard suggestions that those skeptical of Al Gore's spiritual crisis are deniers and one good way to serve the planet would be to have one less kid and I've also read that mankind is 'a virus' and human beings are 'the AIDS of the earth.' Global warming is officially becoming creepy and I can't tell yet if it's facisitc or fetishistic but it's kinda like piercing or tattoos, I don't even wanna get one, because I see how hooked people are and it spooks me. I just find it odd that we've come to a point in history where if I don't concede that if Manhattan will be completely submerged in 2057 I'm thought to be a delusional contrarian by some of my more zealous fellow citizens. I'm sorry Angst Squad, but if we commissioned a public works project (let's call it 'The Manhattan Project') and tried our hardest to submerge Manhattan in the next 50 years, we couldn't pull it off, mainly because it wouldn't be environmentally sound and you guys would hang it up in the permitting process. Simply put, I can't worry about the earth right now because I'm too worried about the world. Why can't I take terrorism as seriously as Al Gore takes global warming? There are times that you think that liberals only fear car bombs if they have leaky exhaust systems. And why am I constantly beaten over the head with 'the delicate balance of nature'? Am I the only one who watches Animal Planet? Every time I turn it on, I see some demented harp seal chucking peguins down his gullet like they were maitre d'Tic-Tacs. To me, nature always appears more unbalanced than Gary Busey with a clogged eustachian tube. Listen, the weather is just like Hilary's explanation for her war vote: we just don't know, do we? We're here to miss our next Tuesday's weather much less the year 2057. Relax, we'll replace oil when we need to. American ingenuity will kick in and the next great fortune will be made. It's not pretty, but it is historically accurate. We need to run out of oil first. That's why I drive an SUV: so we run out of it more quickly. I consider myself at the vanguard of the environmental movement and I think the individuals who insist on driving hybrids are just prolonging our dillemma and I think that's just selfish. Come on, don't you care about our Mother Earth? Don'tcha?”

Dennis Miller (1953) American stand-up comedian, television host, and actor

6/17 The Half Hour News Hour
The Buck Starts Here

Jon Stewart photo
Franklin D. Roosevelt photo

“We must especially beware of that small group of selfish men who would clip the wings of the American Eagle in order to feather their own nests.”

Franklin D. Roosevelt (1882–1945) 32nd President of the United States

1940s, State of the Union Address — The Four Freedoms (1941)

Buckminster Fuller photo

“We can now take care of everybody at a higher standard of living than anybody has ever known. It does not have to be “you or me,” so selfishness is unnecessary and war is obsolete. This has never been done before.”

Buckminster Fuller (1895–1983) American architect, systems theorist, author, designer, inventor and futurist

From 1980s onwards, Norie Huddle interview (1981)
Context: Neither the great political or financial powers of the world nor the population in general realize that the engineering-chemical-electronic revolution now makes it possible to produce many more technical devices with ever less material. We can now take care of everybody at a higher standard of living than anybody has ever known. It does not have to be “you or me,” so selfishness is unnecessary and war is obsolete. This has never been done before. Only twelve years ago technology reached the point where this could be done. Since then it has made it ever so much easier to do.

Letitia Elizabeth Landon photo
John F. Kennedy photo
W. Edwards Deming photo
Albert Einstein photo
Percy Bysshe Shelley photo
Stendhal photo

“Our true passions are selfish.”

Les vraies passions sont égoïstes.
Vol. I, ch. XXI
Le Rouge et le Noir (The Red and the Black) (1830)

D. V. Gundappa photo