Quotes about joke (629 quotes, page 7) | Quotes of famous people

“I have written and spoken and joked with friends the meanest, cruelest, most hateful things that could ever been said by me, have been said about the Clintons. I loathe them. I disagree with Hillary Clinton on just about everything there is to disagree with a person about. If it comes down to Trump and Hillary, I will put a Hillary Clinton sticker on my fucking car.”

Penn Jillette (1955) American magician

2010s, Why Penn Jillette is Terrified of a President Trump (2016)

Cars , Personality , Hate

“Men always made crude jokes about people pissing their pants with fear, but in Sokolov’s experience, shitting the pants was more common if it was a straightforward matter of extreme emotional stress. Pants pissing was completely unproductive and suggested a total breakdown of elemental control. Pants shitting, on the other hand, voided the bowels and thereby made blood available to the brain and the large muscle groups that otherwise would have gone to the lower-priority activity of digestion. Sokolov could have forgiven Peter for shitting his pants, but if he had pissed his pants, then it really would have been necessary to get rid of him.”

Neal Stephenson book Reamde

Day 2
Reamde (2011), Part I: Nine Dragons

Fear , People , Men

“Please don't make me a joke. End the interview with what I believe. I don't mind making jokes, but I don't want to look like one… I want to be an artist, an actress with integrity… If fame goes by, so long, I've had you, fame. If it goes by, I've always known it was fickle. So at least it's something I experienced, but that's not where I live.”

Marilyn Monroe (1926–1962) American actress, model, and singer

Her last taped interview, with Richard Meryman, published in LIFE magazine a few days before her death. (3 August 1962); quoted in Ms. magazine (August 1972)

Making love

“Yes, I am a pro-life, Christian Conservative and an absurdly imperfect hypocrite. So goes the journey of life. Back to wiener jokes.”

Steven Crowder (1987) American actor

Life

“About five years ago, somebody showed me some web sites that had my material all over them, and I thought that was fascinating. One reason was, I'd never seen my jokes written one right after another like that. I write on drawing paper—I don't even like lines on the paper—so I have notebooks all over the place with handwritten pieces of my act in them. So to see it go by, all typed out neatly, was like, "Wow."”

Steven Wright (1955) American actor and author

And then two or three years ago, someone showed me a site, and half of it that said I wrote it, I didn't write. Recently, I saw one, and I didn't write any of it. What's disturbing is that with a few of these jokes, I wish I had thought of them. A giant amount of them, I'm embarrassed that people think I thought of them, because some are really bad.
[The Tenacity of the Cockroach: Conversations with Entertainment's Most Enduring Outsiders, Thompson, Steven, 2002, Three Rivers Press, 0609809911, September 9, 2012, http://www.avclub.com/articles/steven-wright,13796/]
Interviews

Drawing

“What I'm trying to say is... I'm not going to say, "I hate" anything I ever made — but I will say this: My mother is much more proud of what I do now, than all of the fart-joke videos I did in the past.”

Michael Stevens (educator) (1986) Internet personality

Responding to the question "What is your least favorite video?", in "IAMA: Michael Stevens of Vsauce" Reddit (29 April 2014) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hClQ-OER3Y

Past , Hate

“Alas! of what is France thinking? Of a surety, we must awake this slumbering nation, we must take it by the arm, we must shake it, we must speak to it; we must scour the fields, enter the villages, go into the barracks, speak to the soldier who no longer knows what he is doing, speak to the labourer who has in his cabin an engraving of the Emperor, and who, for that reason, votes for everything they ask; we must remove the radiant phantom that dazzles their eyes; this whole situation is nothing but a huge and deadly joke.”

Victor Hugo (1802–1885) French poet, novelist, and dramatist

Book I, VI
Napoleon the Little (1852)

Thinking

“A group of women around a shattered man.
I said with a smile: Let's call him Qais, Laila's mad lover.
The termperature sank abruptly.
Never in my life did I see eyes like those with trailing dresses.
The moment I left him they had, of course, to come after me.
And there they waited for me, one after the other.
I was in a rural city, a strange place on the banks of a river.
And even without my smiling, the shattered man had tired me.
It was in the old house that our meeting took place, and my jokes turned into blood.
I killed them with classic boredom.”

Ounsi el-Hajj (1937–2014) Lebanese poet, journalist, and translator

An Anthology of Modern Arabic Poetry, p. 75
Poetry, Rendezvous

Housing , Waiting , Smile , Lovers

“I should say that when people talk about capitalism it's a bit of a joke. There's no such thing. No country, no business class, has ever been willing to subject itself to the free market, free market discipline. Free markets are for others. Like, the Third World is the Third World because they had free markets rammed down their throat. Meanwhile, the enlightened states, England, the United States, others, resorted to massive state intervention to protect private power, and still do. That's right up to the present. I mean, the Reagan administration for example was the most protectionist in post-war American history. Virtually the entire dynamic economy in the United States is based crucially on state initiative and intervention: computers, the internet, telecommunication, automation, pharmaceutical, you just name it. Run through it, and you find massive ripoffs of the public, meaning, a system in which under one guise or another the public pays the costs and takes the risks, and profit is privatized. That's very remote from a free market. Free market is like what India had to suffer for a couple hundred years, and most of the rest of the Third World.”

Noam Chomsky (1928) american linguist, philosopher and activist

Quotes 1990s, 1995–1999, Sovereignty and World Order, 1999

History , Country , Business , War

“Even if my place of work or the nature of my titles change, what I show won’t change and I don’t want it to. I’m a game fan at heart; I tell dirty jokes and make irresponsible comments (laughs), but I’ll work my hardest to make games.”

Kenichiro Takaki (1976) Japanese video game producer

"Kenichiro Takaki opens up about why he left Marvelous and more" https://nintendoeverything.com/kenichiro-takaki-opens-up-about-why-he-left-marvelous-and-more/, NintendoEverything.com (27 March 2019).

Game , Heart , Nature , Making love

“Jokiness allows a constant trivializing: as if by joking someone is suspending judgment on what is being said. She didn’t mean anything by it; lighten up. A killjoy knows from experience: when people keep making light of something, something heavy is going on”

Sara Ahmed (1969) Australian and British academic

Source: "An Affinity of Hammers" (2016), p. 29

Light , Making love , People

“There's so many inside jokes because you spend so much time together. You spend fourteen hours a day together and you're together all the time and you're doing all these strange activities and there's strange scenes and lines so you just kind of end up with these really weird in-jokes that keep you going and give you belly laughs.”

Isabel Durant (1991) Australian actor and dancer

Source: Exclusive | Mako Mermaids | CAST Reunion https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eDGRc7z7zeA (July 2, 2020)

Time

“…We carry ourselves different — maybe we tell our jokes in a different way or a different style — and we were beating ourselves up in allowing that patriarchal energy to affect our self-esteem. And then I was like, "Yeah, I'm good at this job."”

Phoebe Robinson (1984) American comedian

On how female comedians might initially doubt themselves in “Phoebe Robinson: There's No Excuse For The Lack Of Diversity In Comedy” https://www.npr.org/2018/10/15/657459180/comic-phoebe-robinson-theres-no-excuse-for-hollywoods-lack-of-diversity in NPR (2018 Oct 15)

Way , Self-confidence

“He who laughs last may be the joke.”

Ron English (1959) American artist

Ron English's Fauxlosophy (2016)

“I'm gross. I have hair on my shoulders now. I don't even have a joke for that, that's how much I hate that shit.”

John Mulaney (1982) American actor and comedian

Kid Gorgeous (2018)

Hate

“The problem with this new generation is, they take everything as joking as funny. Even they don't think about tomorrow's life will hold on.”

Ayuel Monykuch (1997) South Sudanese Entrepreneur

Problem , Thinking , Life

“When steak lovers advise you to reincarnate as an animal. You know you are dead before you even begin to live. Reincarnation is a universal joke.”

Mwanandeke Kindembo (1996) Congolese author

Dead , Universe , Animals , Lovers

“I've often started off with a lawyer joke, a complete caricature of a lawyer who's been nasty, greedy, and unethical. But I've stopped that practice. I gradually realized that the lawyers in the audience didn't think the jokes were funny and the non-lawyers didn't know they were jokes.”

William H. Rehnquist (1924–2005) Chief Justice of the United States

1997 speech at University of Virginia Law School, as quoted in Marc Galanter, Lowering the Bar: Lawyer Jokes and Legal Culture (2006), p. 3.
Books, articles, and speeches

Thinking

“A joke is a miracle.”

Jerry Seinfeld (1954) American comedian and actor

"What a Joke" Radio Show (2019)

“A joke can only get laughs for one reason because it resonates.”

Yang Li (1992) Chinese stand-up comedian

Source: "She Mocked Men’s Bluster. Then Came the Complaints." in The New York Times https://www.nytimes.com/2020/12/30/world/asia/male-confidence-comedian-china.html (30 December 2020)

“This year I learned the most important lesson in my life, which is to never make fun of men; and if you have to make fun of them, just joke about their success.”

Yang Li (1992) Chinese stand-up comedian

Source: "‘Sexist’ female stand-up comedian Yang Li’s return sweeps Chinese social media again by gender issues" https://www.globaltimes.cn/page/202108/1231854.shtml?id=11 in Global Times (18 August 2021)

Success , Learning , Men , Life

“Round the birth of "Pickwick" broke one of those literary quarrels that were too common in the life of Dickens.... He turned people into mortal enemies whom he might have turned very easily into immortal jokes.”

G. K. Chesterton Charles Dickens

Source: Charles Dickens (1906), Ch 4 : "The Pickwick Papers"

Life , People , Birth

“I spend most of my day screaming and then over time I get tired and then when I'm tired, I start thinking of the jokes.”

Trevor Noah (1984) South African comedian

Time , Thinking

“It’s better to get the last laugh than the joke.”

Ron English (1959) American artist

Ron English's Fauxlosophy: Volume 2 (2022)

“I joke that it took our family 100 years to travel one mile. But what a journey it has been. Our family story is the story of millions of families whose ancestors came to these shores from all around the world in search of freedom, opportunity, and equality.”

Gary Locke (1950) American politician

"Gary Locke keynotes anti-hate summit" in Northwest Asian Weekly https://nwasianweekly.com/2021/10/gary-locke-keynotes-anti-hate-summit/ (29 October 2021)

Search , Freedom , World , Family

“In my childhood years, I dreamt of being a footballer. But as my friends often joke, they tried to take the ball in an unsportsmanlike way... which is how I became a boxer.”

Vitali Klitschko (1971) Ukrainian boxer and politician

2008
Source: [Виталий Кличко ответил на вопросы читателей Корреспондент.net, https://korrespondent.net/ukraine/politics/386098-vitalij-klichko-otvetil-na-voprosy-chitatelej-korrespondent-net, 2022-06-13, korrespondent.net, ru]

Childhood , Way , Football

“I think Christian comedy has gotten a bad rap in the past because it's very passive, and it's not honest. It's like knock-knock jokes type humor. What we're bringing to the table is another level of honesty, and maybe transparency that I think does make some people uncomfortable.”

John Crist (comedian) (1984) American comedian

[Paulson, Dave, John Crist: A Christian comedian who's gently poking fun at faith, https://www.tennessean.com/story/entertainment/2019/04/11/john-crist-christian-comedian-nashville-comedy-festival-ryman-auditorium/3215394002/, 6 September 2019, The Tennessean, April 11, 2019, en]

People , Past , Thinking

“Anytime you have to threaten people to get them to laugh at your joke you have to consider it less than successful, okay?”

Kim Stanley Robinson (1952) American science fiction writer

Source: Blue Mars (1996), Chapter 14, “Phoenix Lake” (p. 748)

Success , People

“Love needs no explanation, of course. There's nothing to explain. About love or longing. The thoughts that accompany our feelings. It's been there for a long time. Ever since it first came to say hello and then declared itself.

It's not something strange, not easily understood. It's like the togetherness we share today. Sit and chat with friends. Enjoying time and joking. Playing old songs, from The Beatles, Frank Sinatra, Matt Monro and Elvis Presley.

We're not too old to go back to those days. Revisiting the stories of the past. Talking about paintings from Sudjojono or Affandi to Dede Eri Supria and Lucia Hartini. Arguing who is greater; Chairil, Sapardi or Sutardji?

We put aside the issues of political depravity and the news of leadership succession that is not what the public expects. Let time resolve everything. Better to talk about climate change, which is sometimes cloudy and sometimes sunny. Or the heat that does not hesitate to burn your head until it reaches 37° while in other places heavy rains cause floods everywhere. We will never know, until the wind takes us back from the past.”

Titon Rahmawan

Painting , Love , Feeling , Change

Quotes about joke page 7

Quotes about joke
page 7