Quotes about monkey
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Janusz Korwin-Mikke photo
H. G. Wells photo
Eddie Izzard photo

“It has been suggested that an army of monkeys might be trained to pound typewriters at random in the hope that ultimately great works of literature would be produced. Using a coin for the same purpose may save feeding and training expenses and free the monkeys for other monkey business.”

William Feller (1906–1970) Croatian-American mathematician

Source: An Introduction To Probability Theory And Its Applications (Third Edition), Chapter VIII, Unlimited Sequences Of Bernoulli Trials, p. 202.

Jacques Monod photo

“One day, almost exactly 25 years ago - it was at the beginning of the bleak winter of 1940 - I entered André Lwoff’s office at the Pasteur Institute. I wanted to discuss with him some of the rather surprising observations I had recently made.
I was working then at the old Sorbonne, in an ancient laboratory that opened on a gallery full of stuffed monkeys. Demobilized in August in the Free Zone after the disaster of 1940, I had succeeded in locating my family living in the Northern Zone and had resumed my work with desperate eagerness. I interrupted work from time to time only to help circulate the first clandestine tracts. I wanted to complete as quickly as possible my doctoral dissertation, which, under the strongly biometric influence of Georges Teissier, I had devoted to the study of the kinetics of bacterial growth. Having determined the constants of growth in the presence of different carbohydrates, it occurred to me that it would be interesting to determine the same constants in paired mixtures of carbohydrates From the first experiment on, I noticed that, whereas the growth was kinetically normal in the presence of certain mixtures (that is, it exhibited a single exponential phase), two complete growth cycles could be observed in other carbohydrate mixtures, these cycles consisting of two exponential phases separated by a-complete cessation of growth.”

Jacques Monod (1910–1976) French biologist

Introduction
From enzymatic adaptation to allosteric transitions (1965)

“The only thing I care about is whether a monkey will turn out a property I can publish. I don't have any love for them. Never have. I don't really like animals. I despise cats. I hate dogs. How could you like monkeys?”

Harry Harlow (1905–1981) American psychologist

Interview with Pittsburgh Press-Roto, 1974. Quoted in Blum, Deborah. The Monkey Wars. Oxford University Press, 1994, p. 92.

“A monkey's transformed body weds the human mind.
Mind is a monkey—this, the truth profound.”

Wú Chéng'ēn (1500–1582) Chinese writer

Commentarial verses in chapter 7
Journey to the West [Xiyouji] (1592)

Doug Dorst photo

“Of course there is a monkey. There is always a monkey.”

Doug Dorst book S.

S. (2013)

David Brewster photo
Thomas Henry Huxley photo
Karl Pilkington photo

“Turns out it was another load of monkeys from another part of the island…from the rough bit…”

Karl Pilkington (1972) English television personality, social commentator, actor, author and former radio producer

Xfm 21 June 2003
On Monkeys

Li Bai photo
Craig Venter photo
Richard D. Ryder photo
P. D. Ouspensky photo
David Hume photo
Linus Torvalds photo

“We don't merge kernel code just because user space was written by a retarded monkey on crack.”

Linus Torvalds (1969) Finnish-American software engineer and hacker

Torvalds, Linus, 2015-06-23, <nowiki>Linus Torvalds on the LKM mailing list</nowiki>, 2015-02-07 https://lkml.org/lkml/2015/6/23/657,
2010s, 2015

Jon Stewart photo

“I'm not going to be your monkey.”

Jon Stewart (1962) American political satirist, writer, television host, actor, media critic and stand-up comedian

Crossfire Appearance (2004)
Context: Stewart: You have a responsibility to the public discourse, and you fail miserably.
Carlson: You need to get a job at a journalism school, I think.
Stewart: You need to go to one. [... ]
Carlson: Wait. I thought you were going to be funny. Come on. Be funny.
Stewart: No. No. I'm not going to be your monkey.

P. L. Travers photo

“Friend Monkey is really my favorite of all my books because the Hindu myth on which it is based is my favorite — the myth of the Monkey Lord who loved so much that he created chaos wherever he went. … when you read the Ramayana you’ll come across the story of Hanuman on which I built my version of that very old myth.
I love Friend Monkey.”

P. L. Travers (1899–1996) Australian-British novelist, actress and journalist

I love the story of Hanuman. For many years, it remained in my very blood because he’s someone who loves too much and can’t help it. I don’t know where I first heard of him, but the story remained with me and I knew it would come out of me somehow or other. But I didn’t know what shape it would take.
The Paris Review interview (1982)

Peter Gabriel photo

“Shock the monkey to life.”

Peter Gabriel (1950) English singer-songwriter, record producer and humanitarian

Shock The Monkey
Song lyrics, Peter Gabriel (IV), Security (1982)

Jon Stewart photo

“It's a brilliant metaphor. What I meant to say was, when you see a monkey masturbating at the zoo…”

Jon Stewart (1962) American political satirist, writer, television host, actor, media critic and stand-up comedian

C-SPAN interview, October 14, 2004, when asked about the above quote.

Jon Stewart photo

“When you go to the zoo and you see a monkey throwing poop, you go, "that's what monkeys do, what are you gonna do?" But what I wish the media would do more frequently is say "bad monkey."”

Jon Stewart (1962) American political satirist, writer, television host, actor, media critic and stand-up comedian

Charlie Rose interview, September 29, 2004
Context: If I was to really get at the burr in my saddle, it's not politics — and this is, I think, probably a horrible analogy — but I look at politicians as, they are doing what inherently they need to do to retain power. Their job is to consolidate power. When you go to the zoo and you see a monkey throwing poop, you go, "that's what monkeys do, what are you gonna do?" But what I wish the media would do more frequently is say "bad monkey."

Octavio Paz photo

“The Great Monkey closes his eyes, scratches himself again and muses: before the sun has become completely hidden — it is now fleeing amid the tall bamboo trees like an animal pursued by shadows — I shall succeed in reducing this grove of trees to a catalogue.”

Octavio Paz (1914–1998) Mexican writer laureated with the 1990 Nobel Prize for Literature

Source: The Monkey Grammarian (1974), Ch. 8
Context: The Great Monkey closes his eyes, scratches himself again and muses: before the sun has become completely hidden — it is now fleeing amid the tall bamboo trees like an animal pursued by shadows — I shall succeed in reducing this grove of trees to a catalogue. A page of tangled plant calligraphy. A thicket of signs: how to read it, how to clear a path through this denseness? Hanumān smiles with pleasure at the analogy that has just occurred to him: calligraphy and vegetation, a grove of trees and writing, reading and a path. Following a path: reading a stretch of ground, deciphering a fragment of world. Reading considered as a path toward…. The path as a reading: an interpretation of the natural world? He closes his eyes once more and sees himself, in another age, writing (on a piece of paper or on a rock, with a pen or with a chisel?) the act in the Mahanātaka describing his visit to the grove of the palace of Rāvana. He compares its rhetoric to a page of indecipherable calligraphy and thinks: the difference between human writing and divine consists in the fact that the number of signs of the former is limited, whereas that of the latter is infinite; hence the universe is a meaningless text, one which even the gods find illegible. The critique of the universe (and that of the gods) is called grammar…. Disturbed by this strange thought, Hanumān leaps down from the wall, remains for a moment in a squatting position, then stands erect, scrutinizes the four points of the compass, and resolutely makes his way into the thicket.

David Brewster photo

“The mouse, even, has not been transmuted into the cat, nor the hen into the turkey, nor the duck into the goose, nor the hawk into the eagle, and still less the monkey into the man.”

David Brewster (1781–1868) British astronomer and mathematician

The facts and fancies of Mr. Darwin (1862)
Context: Though the large runt pigeon, with its massive beak and its huge feet, differs from its blue and barred progenitor the rock, it is a pigeon still. Though the slender Italian greyhound has a strange contrast with the short-legged bull-dog, they are both dogs in their teeth and in their skull. The mouse, even, has not been transmuted into the cat, nor the hen into the turkey, nor the duck into the goose, nor the hawk into the eagle, and still less the monkey into the man.

“If the resident zoologist of Galaxy X had visited the earth 5 million years ago while making his inventory of inhabited planets in the universe, he would surely have corrected his earlier report that apes showed more promise than Old World monkeys and noted that monkeys had overcome an original disadvantage to gain domination among primates.”

He will confirm this statement after his visit next year—but also add a footnote that one species from the ape bush has enjoyed an unusual and unexpected flowering, thus demanding closer monitoring.
"The Declining Empire of Apes", p. 288
Eight Little Piggies (1993)

J. Howard Moore photo
Kevin D. Williamson photo
Robert A. Heinlein photo
Annie Dillard photo
Rocco Siffredi photo
Balasaraswati photo

“There used to be beggar, a sort of maniac, who would jump up and dance like a monkey while singing tat tarigappa tei ta, tat tarigappa tei ta.”

Balasaraswati (1918–1984) Indian dancer

Bala would imitate him, both dancing like monkeys... All of us tried to snub him but the beggar could not be turned out. It meant a few coins for him; he made a regular visit to our house and the two used to dance. That was the real starting point for Bala’s dancing mania.

Shingai Shoniwa photo
Richard Rodríguez photo

“OK, monkey, it's just you and me... I'll give you time to pray to your big, filthy monkey god before I food you.”

Darby Conley (1970) American cartoonist

LoserPalooza and daily strip for July 28, 2003
Bucky Katt

Alastair Reynolds photo
Liu Xiao Ling Tong photo

“I don't want to see children asking me how many monsters girlfriends does the Monkey King have anymore!”

Liu Xiao Ling Tong (1959) Chinese actor

(zh-CN) 我不希望下一次再有小朋友问我,孙悟空到底交了几个妖精女朋友。

Source: 六小龄童:不希望再被问孙悟空有几个妖精女友, 羊城晚报, 搜狐新闻, 2016-01-04, 2019-01-30 http://news.sohu.com/20160104/n433369454.shtml,

Liu Xiao Ling Tong photo

“Monkey opera is not belonging to the Zhang family, it belongs to China and the whole world.”

Liu Xiao Ling Tong (1959) Chinese actor

(zh-CN) 猴戏不姓章,属于中国,也属于世界。

Source: [六小龄童回故乡讲座 诠释对“章氏猴戏”情感, http://ent.people.com.cn/GB/n1/2018/0928/c81372-30319084.html, People's Daily Online, 11 January 2019, 28 September 2018]

Daniel Abraham photo
James Thomson (B.V.) photo
Tony Leung photo
Alastair Reynolds photo