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The Groucho Letters
Groucho MarxThe Groucho Letters
Groucho MarxFamous Groucho Marx Quotes
Source: The Essential Groucho: Writings For By And About Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx Funny quotes
Apparently attributed to Marx in Bennett Cerf's Try and Stop Me, first published in 1944. A citation of this can been seen in the Kentucky New Era on November 9, 1964 http://news.google.com/newspapers?id=X-orAAAAIBAJ&sjid=ZWcFAAAAIBAJ&pg=4581,3323702&dq=art-of-looking-for-trouble&hl=en. Also attributed to Marx by Rand Paul in "The Long Stand," ch. 1 of Taking a Stand: Moving Beyond Partisan Politics to Unite America (New York, N. Y.: Center Street, 26 May 2015), p. 5. <br class="br">The original quotation belongs to Sir Ernest Benn (Henry Powell Spring, What is Truth?, Orange Press, 1944, p. 31 https://books.google.com/books?id=snxbAAAAMAAJ&q=Ernest+benn+%22Politics+is+the+art+of%22&dq=Ernest+benn+%22Politics+is+the+art+of%22&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0CCMQ6AEwAjgUahUKEwiK3Zm-qojIAhWGVZIKHdFYBqY); a first known citation reportedly appears in the Springfield (MA) Republican on July 27, 1930. <br class="br">Misattributed <br class="br">Variant: Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies. <br class="br">Source: Gyles Brandreth, Word Play: A cornucopia of puns, anagrams and other contortions and curiosities of the English language, Coronet, 2015.
As quoted in Halliwell’s Filmgoer’s Companion (1984) by Leslie Halliwell
Variant: I find TV very educational. Every time someone switches it on I go into another room and read a good book.
“I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.”
Quote by Leo Rosten in The Many Worlds of Leo Rosten http://books.google.com/books?id=8FkwAAAAIAAJ&q=%22i+never+forget+a+face+but+in+your+case+i'll+be+glad+to+make+an+exception%22&pg=PA17#v=onepage (1964)
Groucho Marx Quotes about time
“I have had a wonderful time but this wasn't it.”
Variant: I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.
“Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.”
No known citation to Marx. First appears unattributed in mid-1960s logic/computing texts as an example of the difficulty of machine parsing of ambiguous statements. Google Books http://books.google.co.uk/books?client=firefox-a&lr=&as_brr=0&q=%22fruit-flies%22+%22time+flies%22+banana&btnG=Search+Books&as_drrb_is=b&as_minm_is=0&as_miny_is=1900&as_maxm_is=0&as_maxy_is=1970. The Yale Book of Quotations dates the attribution to Marx to a 9 July 1982 net.jokes post on Usenet. <br class="br">Misattributed
From his autobiography Groucho and Me (1959)
Variant: Although it is generally known, I think it's about time to announce that I was born at a very early age.
Groucho Marx: Trending quotes
“Most young women do not welcome promiscuous advances. (Either that, or my luck's terrible.)”
Source: Memoirs Of A Mangy Lover
Groucho Marx Quotes
To S J Perelman about his book Dawn Ginsbergh’s Revenge (1929), as quoted in LIFE (9 February 1962)
“Please accept my resignation. I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member.”
As quoted in The Groucho Letters (1967) by Arthur Sheekman. The sentiment predates Marx by 61 years, however; it likely originated with John Galsworthy in The Forsyte Saga. In Part I, Chapter II, "Old Jolyon Goes to the Opera" http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/2559, it's said of Old Jolyon that, "He naturally despised the Club that did take him." after another refused him because he was in a trade. <br class="br">Variant: I sent the club a wire stating: «Please accept my resignation. I don't want to belong to any club that will accept me as a member». <br class="br">Source: Groucho and Me
“I don't have a photograph. I'd give you my footprints, but they're upstairs in my socks.”
When asked for a photograph for identification
The Groucho Phile (1976)
“No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.”
From his book Groucho and Me. It is a variation of a maxim by 17th-century French nobleman François de La Rochefoucauld: "In the adversity of our best friends, we often find something that is not displeasing." (Maxim 99 from Reflections; or Sentences and Moral Maxims, 1665 edition.)
“Die, my dear? Why that's the last thing I'll do!”
Last words[citation needed]
Lord Palmerston had similar last words in 1865: "Die, my dear doctor! That's the last thing I shall do!"[citation needed]
Source: The Essential Groucho: Writings by, for, and about Groucho Marx
Source: Memoirs Of A Mangy Lover
“The only real laughter comes from despair.”
Groucho Marx book The Groucho Letters
Source: The Groucho Letters
“Here's to our wives and girlfriends… may they never meet!”
citation needed
Variation on an old Royal Navy wardroom toast: "Wives and Sweethearts! May they never meet!"[citation needed]
