Warren Farrell Quotes

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“Does the new heroine mean your son won’t have to risk his life for her love?”

“To be a hero is to be emotionally constipated.”

“When boys and men are told they are needed, they respond, and become responsible.”

“Guns are not the cause of the boy crisis, but as we are working on the causes, the control of guns can limit the damage of dad-deprived sons.”

“If we get more of what we pay for, then let’s pay to get more dads, rather than pay more when dads are absent.”

“We spend billions to get from dads the money few of them have, and virtually nothing to allow dads to give the time they do have—the time their children need.”

“Mastery of content that is measurable, tangible, and translates into respect.”

“The future will increasingly see the home place becoming the work place.”

“A mom has the right to children, but a dad has to fight for children.”

“The word “warrior” is not added lightly. A warrior makes himself aware of the barriers to achieving his purpose. Then, rather than focus on what is standing in his way, a warrior focuses on how to get past those barriers. Which is exactly what he’ll be teaching his children.”

“Parenting plans should be consistent.”

“Among guys, if you can’t tease ’em, you can’t trust ’em.”

“Playing with dad is like being on a roller coaster—kids are excited because they feel safe.”

“Empathy is a virtue which, when it only goes from parent to child, and is not required of the child, becomes a vice.”

“Careers are for Now, Children are Forever.”

“And when boys are hurt, they hurt us—physically, psychologically, and economically.”

“Dads—like moms, air, and water—are essential to our lives.”

“The discipline of postponing gratification is the single most important discipline your son needs.”

“In the traditional male hero’s hierarchy of needs, self-actualization is nowhere to be found—because the more he values himself, the less he is willing to sacrifice himself.”

“The traditional male hero is about self-sacrifice, not self-actualization.”

“Pick-up sports are excellent preparation for entrepreneurship.”

“Exercise helps build the muscle of a child’s brain even more effectively than studying.”

“We interview people who are extraordinary successes, so they are visible. We ignore people who create a balanced life, so they are invisible.”

“A key measure of emotional intelligence is knowing that every virtue taken to its extreme becomes a vice.”

“Boys who are not interested in school almost always have an interest that can be catalyzed into future employment if it is pursued via hands-on experience.”

“Should your son follow his bliss, it’s most likely the money he’ll miss.”

“Women who have the option of being economically self-sustaining will increasingly want your son to also have emotional and relationship intelligence.”

“And without love, your son’s purpose has no purpose.”

“The women who were best able to grow spiritually and psychologically had married men who were the least able to grow.”

“Many of the qualities your son develops to kill in war—or be a hero at work—undermine the qualities it takes to love at home.”

“The pay of the volunteer fireman? Praise. Respect. Purpose.”

“In The Deadliest Catch, the death the men face is the source of entertainment, but not of concern.”

“Your son learns the “hero paradox”: to value himself by not valuing himself.”

“The word hero derives from the root *ser-, from which we also get the word “servant.””

“The women’s movement warned every girl how marriage can seduce her to make a sacrifice of her career. But no one warned every boy how marriage can seduce him to make a sacrifice in his career.”

“Your son’s heroes didn’t climb traditional ladders—they built their own.”

“Your son may simultaneously feel that the male role is pressuring him to feel obligated to earn money someone else spends while he dies sooner.”

“Whether or not we know our dad, we have a relationship with him. The relationship in our mind is our relationship.”

“Fatherhood was about your dad trading in the old glint in his eye—what he loved to do—for the new glint in his eye: his love for you.”

“The road to high pay is a toll road.”

“If he followed his bliss, it’s the money you’d miss.”

“Whether we call it ikigai or sense of purpose, when we pursue what we believe gives life meaning, it gives us life.”

“The more a boy represses his feelings and puts armor around his heart, the harder it is to open our hearts to him.”

“To win wars, we had to train our sons to be disposable. We honored boys if they died so we could live. We called them heroes.”

“Sensitivity to the death and suffering of boys and men is in competition with our survival instinct.”