“Look, I asked you here for a reason. Much as I hate to admit it, vampire, we have something in common."
"Totally awesome hair?" Simon suggested.”

“Vampires smiled for many reasons, but when a vampire male smiled at you from this distance with that kind of look in his eyes it was done for one purpose only: to impress. Look at my big teeth. I’m an apex predator. My genetic material is awesome.”

“I was looking for Simon."
Jordan squinted at her. "It's two in the morning."
She shrugged. "He's a vampire."
"But I'm not.”

“Dmitri was at a total loss. It was a common reaction for people when I agreed to do something reasonable.”

“Isabelle glanced back at them. "They're staring at you. Maybe their master died and they're looking for another vampire to own them. You could have pets." She grinned.
"Or," Simon said,"maybe they're here for the hash browns.”

“Clary - "Look you can date whoever you want and I will totally support you. I am all about support. Support is my middle name."

Simon- "So that's why you never told me your middle name. I figured it was something embarrasing.”

“I'm gross. I have hair on my shoulders now. I don't even have a joke for that, that's how much I hate that shit.”

“You weaseled your way into my life, Simon Lewis, and I don’t know how or why or even when but it happened, and I kind of hate it but I can’t change it, and here it is”

“You ate something yesterday. You sure?"asked Simon
Jace shrugged."Well, I wouldnt swear on a stack of Bibles. I think it was yesterday, though.”

“I can't relax here. These people have no pubic hair anywhere. We have pubic hair on the ceiling.”