Dylan Moran quotes

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Dylan Moran

Birthdate: 3. November 1971

Dylan William Moran is an Irish comedian, writer, actor, filmmaker and artist. He is best known for his observational comedy, the television sitcom Black Books and his work with Simon Pegg in Shaun of the Dead and Run Fatboy Run. He appeared as one of the two lead characters in the Irish black comedy titled A Film with Me in It in 2008.

Moran's most recent film is Calvary, an Irish black comedy drama film written and directed by John Michael McDonagh. Moran is a regular performer at national and international comedy festivals including the Edinburgh Festival Fringe, Just for Laughs Montreal Comedy Festival, the Melbourne International Comedy Festival and the Kilkenny Comedy Festival. In 2007, Moran was voted the 17th-greatest stand-up comic on Channel 4's 100 Greatest Stand-Ups and again in the updated 2010 list as the 14th-greatest stand-up comic. He lives in Edinburgh with his wife, Elaine, and two children.

Quotes Dylan Moran

„Would you like red or white wine with your piece of vulcanised lizards cock from the moon? How about an extra bread roll, there to dip in your otter vomit pate?“

—  Dylan Moran

And you're going, "Red or white wine, well, what would you like, darling? I don't know, what would you like?", all to block out the thought that's in your mind which is - "We're gonna die, we're all gonna die, we're all gonna die, right now. The plane is made of metal, the wings are made of metal, we're all eating, and I'm the only non-terrorist aboard, we're all going to die."
On travelling by aeroplane.
Like, Totally (2006)

„Or Berlusconi, in Italy, right; the envy of the world, Italy, in terms of history, art and culture, 98 different political parties, and they still managed to elect him!“

—  Dylan Moran

He’s so fucking crooked he sleeps on a spiral staircase! So thoroughly corrupt, every time he smiles an angel gets gonorrhoea! He's had so many face-lifts, his face has moved to the top of his head, you have to get on a step-ladder to watch him lie!
On Italian Prime Minister, Silvio Berlusconi.
What It Is (2009)

„Your nose hair… which is grey… is in my eye.“

—  Dylan Moran

On how to hurt the ones you really love.
Like, Totally (2006)

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