“We'll have peanut butter crackers and juice and use the bidet!”

“Tyson thought Annabeth was just about the coolest thing since peanut butter, and he SERIOUSLY loved peanut butter.”

“Jack: I know, but peanut butter?”

“When you buy a box of Ritz crackers, on the back of the box, they have all these suggestions as to what to put on top of the Ritz. "Try it with turkey and cheese. Try it with peanut butter." But I like crackers man, that's why I bought it, 'cause I like crackers! I don't see a suggestion to put a Ritz on top of a Ritz. I didn't buy them because they're little edible plates! You've got no faith in the product itself.”

“Man can not live by bread alone… he must have peanut butter.”

“Without peanut butter, I might starve.”

“Romance novels are birthday cake and life is often peanut butter and jelly. I think everyone should have lots of delicious romance novels lying around for those times when the peanut butter of life gets stuck to the roof of your mouth.”

“You can always trust a dog that likes peanut butter.”

“Yes," he said sincerely. "Such a one deserves peanut butter on the seat of his pants.”

“If you can't control your peanut butter, you can't expect to control your life.”