“[Everyone needs] a woman who'll listen, take your side, tell the truth - or not, as you need it. A woman you can count on, no matter what, and who'll love you no matter how much you screw up.”

“I swear people don't want sex so much as they want somebody who'll listen to 'em … the first thing you learn after fellatio is how to listen.”

Lily Tomlin (1939) American actress, comedian, writer, and producer

“I swear people don't want sex so much as they want somebody who'll listen to 'em … the first thing you learn after fellatio is how to listen.”

Jane Wagner (1935) Playwright, actress

“To be completely woman you need a master, and in him a compass for your life. You need a man you can look up to and respect. If you dethrone him it's no wonder that you are discontented, and discontented women are not loved for long.”

Marlene Dietrich (1901–1992) German-American actress and singer

“I've learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.”

Andy Rooney (1919–2011) writer, humorist, television personality

“But there are people who'll try to hurt you through the good they see in you--knowing that it's the good, needing it and punishing you for it. Don't let it break you when you discover that.”

Ayn Rand book Atlas Shrugged

“The truth is that, no matter what kind of game you find yourself in, no matter how good or bad the luck, you can change your life completely with a single thought or a single act of love”

Gregory David Roberts book Shantaram

“She (Monica Lewinsky) is the kinda girl who'll blow a guy and call you and tell you all about it.”

Kathy Griffin (1960) American actress and comedian

“It’s not what you do, but how much love you put into it that matters.”

Rick Warren (1954) Christian religious leader

“No matter what you do, no matter how hard you try, you're screwed because it's all fixed and rigged. There is a club and you ain't in it.”

George Carlin (1937–2008) American stand-up comedian