Karl Pilkington: Trending quotes

Karl Pilkington trending quotes. Read the latest quotes in collection
Karl Pilkington: 320 quotes4 likes

“They've found this spider, in the jungle. Three foot long, it eats chicken. Bit weird, innit. People moan saying that you shouldn't lock animals up and all the rest of it, but to be honest I wish it was locked up. The idea that it's roaming in a jungle… get it locked up.”

Karl Pilkington

3 Minute Wonder, Episode 4
On Nature

“Does the brain control you or are you controlling the brain? I don't know if I'm in charge of mine.”

Karl Pilkington

Podcast Series 2 Episode 6
On Biology

“I saw a cockroach playing Pacman. It was on the internet, right, and somebody had linked up a cockroach to err… to some… I can't even be bothered explaining it, but that's what I'm saying - everything is moving on”

Karl Pilkington

The Podfather Trilogy, Episode 3 Christmas
On Nature

“Walking down the street in London with Suzanne, saw a little homeless.. well I didn't see the homeless bloke right, I saw a leg stickin out of a doorway, thought 'here we go', right. Walked past it, right, you're not gonna believe this. Homeless…. Chinese fella. I've never seen one of them.”

Karl Pilkington

Podcast Series 1 Episode 4
On People

“It is hard eating a little kangaroo knob.”

Karl Pilkington

Podcast Series 1 Episode 3
On Nature

“By 78 you've done everything you're going to do. If you haven't bungee-jumped by the time you're 78 you're not going to do it.”

Karl Pilkington

Podcast Series 1 Episode 1
On Ageing

“Who's the mental one here? Is it me, or everyone else?”

Karl Pilkington

The Moaning of Life, Karl on Kids

“Any problem solved is a new problem made.”

Karl Pilkington

Podcast Series 5 Episode 1
On Life

“I've never understood what pole dancing's about anyway. It's a waste of a good skill. Get into scaffolding or something.”

Karl Pilkington

The Moaning of Life, General Quotes

“You build up to it, don't you? You have that bit of a chat, and you go alright? Hows it going?. You get on an' that and then a little baby pops out.”

Karl Pilkington

Podcast Series 1 Episode 3
On Sex

“…but it’s all about ‘a gorilla and a fox are walking thru the woods.’ How often does that happen?”

Karl Pilkington

Xfm
On Aesop's Fables

“Whoop, there's an elephant in the room”

Karl Pilkington

Podcast Series 1 Episode 6
On Sayings

“Well…like, when you're born, you're a little baby, you're wrinkly and stuff, when you get older you sort of morph into a baby again…”

Karl Pilkington

Xfm 01 December 2001
On Ageing

“I've been watchin birds more than insects recently, and the thing I've found with pigeons is: they've got wings but they walk a lot”

Karl Pilkington

Podcast Series 3 Episode 3
On Nature

“The best thing you can do is look after yourself. Get on with it.”

Karl Pilkington

Podcast Series 2 Episode 5
On Sayings

“(After chatting about the Serbian sex machine invention and Karl said 'Did it have to be a woman or could they have got a gay fella in - butt plugs and that')..”

Karl Pilkington

On Sex

“If an animal is named after what it eats, how interesting is it?”

Karl Pilkington

Xfm 26 July 2003
On Nature

“No it's one of them things though, imagine it.. if you're that caretaker and you're thinkin I've got away with this then suddenly a plant grasses you up.. you weren't expectin that.”

Karl Pilkington

Podcast - Bonus Hour
On Nature

“People who live in a glass house have to answer the door - Karl invents his own phrase based on Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.”

Karl Pilkington

Podcast Series 1 Episode 6
On Sayings

“I've got a fat head. There's nothing I can do about it.”

Karl Pilkington

The Moaning of Life, General Quotes