Jerry Seinfeld: End

Jerry Seinfeld is American comedian and actor. Explore interesting quotes on end.

Jerry Seinfeld: 104 quotes8 likes

“The biggest laugh has to come at the end.”

Quoted in a video interview for The New York Times Magazine YouTube channel (20 December 2012)

“Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.”

"Confessions of an unromantic man," Redbook magazine, Vol. 176, Iss. 4, (Feb 1991): 62.

“Let's face it: a date is a job-interview, that lasts all night. The only difference between a date and a job interview is: not many job-interviews is there a chance you'll end up naked at the end of it.”

Jerry Seinfeld

I'm Telling You for the Last Time (1998)
Context: What is a date, really, but a job interview that lasts all night? The only difference is there aren't many job interviews where there's a chance you'll end up naked at the end of it. "Well, Bill, the boss thinks you're the right man for the job; why don't you strip down and meet some of the people you'll be working with?"

“Women have two orgasms, the real ones and the ones they make up on their own. And I can give you the male point of view on this, which is: we're fine with it. You do whatever you have to do, and we'll do whatever we have to…. To a man, sex is like a car accident anyway, and trying to determine a female orgasm is like asking, "What did you see after the car went out of control?" "Well, there were a lot of screeching noises, I was facing the wrong way at one point, and in the end, my body was thrown clear."”

Jerry Seinfeld

I'm Telling You for the Last Time (1998)

“Poetry is bad standup. It's carefully chosen words that have no laugh at the end.”

Jerry Seinfeld

Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee (2012 — Present), Season 9 (2017)