“I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble.”Janet Evanovich Twelve SharpSource: Twelve Sharp
“I see you looking at my cookies,' my father said to Morelli. 'Don't even think about it. Go get your own cookies.”Janet Evanovich Twelve SharpSource: Twelve Sharp
“Gotta protect the little dudes. I tried an AK-47, but it wouldn't fit under my seat. I like the Uzi better, anyway. It looks better with the dress. The AK seems too casual to me.”Janet Evanovich
“I looked over at him. "Is that a proposal?"There was total silence for a couple beats. "I'm not sure. It just popped out.""Let me know when you're sure.""Would you say yes?" Morelli asked."I'm not sure.”Janet Evanovich book Fearless FourteenSource: Fearless Fourteen
“I checked my phone messages. Three in all.The first was from Joe. “Hey, Cupcake.” That was it. That was the whole message.The second was from Ranger. “Yo.” Ranger made Joe look like a chatterbox.”Janet Evanovich book To the NinesSource: To the Nines
“I wasn’t a fabulous cook. I didn’t have a boyfriend, much less a husband. And I wasn’t a big financial success. I could live with all those failings as long as I knew that once in a while I looked really hot.”Janet Evanovich High FiveSource: High Five
“I went to the door, and Gary tried hard not to notice I was blue. He looked at his feet, and he looked above my head, and he cleared his throat.It's okay,' I said. 'I know I'm blue.'It caught me by surprise,' he said. 'I didn't want to seem rude.”Janet Evanovich book Fearless FourteenSource: Fearless Fourteen
“From the look on your face, I'd say you know him."I nodded. "Sold him a cannoli when I was in high school."Connie grunted. "Honey, half of all the women in New Jersey have sold him their cannoli”Janet Evanovich book One for the MoneySource: One for the Money
“Morelli beeped his truck unlocked. “If you’re looking for your rent-a-cop, I told Ranger you’d be with me this morning.” “Did he make you take a blood oath that you’d protect me?” “He asked me if I had adequate health insurance.”Janet Evanovich book To the NinesSource: To the Nines
“You never want to look in a mirror," Lula said. "Men love mirrors. They look at themselves doing the deed and they see Rex the Wonder Horse. Women look at themselves and think they need to renew their membership at the gym.”Janet Evanovich book Seven UpSource: Seven Up
“I buy wine according to the bottle design. After I get down the first glass it all tastes okay to me so I figure you go for something classy to look at on the table”Janet Evanovich Source: Smokin' Seventeen
“Looks like you're on a roll. This is the second car you've toasted this week."Carl Costanza - Hot Six”Janet Evanovich book Hot SixSource: Hot Six