Quotes from work

Hard Eight

“Calories don’t count if they’re connected to a celebration. Everyone knows this.”

“I wasn't dating anyone. I was fornicating with Batman.”

“As long as he has a house with two bathrooms. I swear to God, I don't care if he's Jack the Ripper.”

“The way I see it, life is a jelly doughnut. You don't really know what it's about until you bite into it. And then, just when you decided it's good, you drop a big glob of jelly on your best T-shirt.”

“We don't usually write up accidents involving rabbits.
- Joe Morelli”

“Omygod, I haven’t got years. I’ll have to hide in the Bat Cave.”
“Once you go to the Bat Cave it’s forever, babe.”
Eeek.”