“Oprah's quitting in 2011. Now we know why the Mayans ended their calendar in 2012”

— Craig Ferguson

Last update June 3, 2021. History

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Craig Ferguson 118

Scottish-born American television host, stand-up comedian, … 1962

Flora Thompson (1876–1947) English author and poet

February Chapter The Peverel Papers - A yearbook of the countryside ed Julian Shuckburgh Century Hutchinson 1986
The Peverel Papers

“Say if I was in charge and someone said that buildin' needs knockin' down, it's dangerous, if we didn't have a calendar we'd go 'erm let's do it now then.' Whereas cos we've got a calendar it's easy to say…'next Wednesday”

Karl Pilkington (1972) English television personality, social commentator, actor, author and former radio producer

The Podfather Trilogy , Episode 2 Thanksgiving
On Calendars

“We are not quite novels.
We are not quite short stories.
In the end, we are collected works.”

Gabrielle Zevin (1977) American writer

Source: The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry

“And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
'Cause this could be the end of everything,
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?”

Lily Allen (1985) English singer, songwriter, actress, and television presenter

This song, Somewhere Only We Know, originated with the group Keane, in 2004, although Allen did a very popular version of it, on a YouTube video in 2013 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mer6X7nOY_o.
Misattributed

“Where is the beginning?
Where is the end?
Why did we fall into days?
Why are we calling out into the endlessness?
Who knows the way it is?
Who knows what time will not tell us?”

Enya (1961) Irish singer, songwriter, and musician

Song lyrics, Amarantine (2005)

“Life is boring. People are vengeful. Good things always end. We do so many things and we don’t know why, and if we do find out why, it’s decades later and knowing why doesn’t matter any more.”

Douglas Coupland (1961) Canadian novelist, short story writer, playwright, and graphic designer

“Why is it we don't always recognize the moment when love begins, but we always know when it ends?”

Steve Martin (1945) American actor, comedian, musician, author, playwright, and producer

As Harris K. Telemacher in "L.A. Story" (1991)

“There is presumably a calendar date — a moment — when the onus of proof passed from the atheist to the believer, when, quite suddenly, secretly, the noes had it.”

Tom Stoppard Jumpers

George, Act I
Jumpers (1972)

“I don't believe it can end. Now that I've seen what war is, what civil war is, I know that everybody, if one day it should end, ought to ask himself: "And what shall we make of the fallen? Why are they dead?" I wouldn't know what to say. Not now, at any rate. Nor does it seem to me that the others know. Perhaps only dead know, and only for them is the war really over.”

Cesare Pavese (1908–1950) Italian poet, novelist, literary critic, and translator

Ending words
The house on the hill (1949)

“Why quit? It's the only thing I know. Quitting is like hanging up your soul on the wall and closing the door on it.”

Red Skelton (1913–1997) American comedian

Red Skelton kicked off his career with Circus https://news.google.com/newspapers?nid=2002&dat=19740730&id=7AgvAAAAIBAJ&sjid=wNoFAAAAIBAJ&pg=2778,3650439 (July 30, 1974)

“Oprah's quitting in 2011. Now we know why the Mayans ended their calendar in 2012”

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Craig Ferguson 118

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