“All Dogs Go To Heaven? Sorry, kids. It's only the dogs who've accepted Christ.”

“Sorry about your sausage dog.”

“If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.”

“For anyone who feels our of place in the land of small dogs the only thing left is to become a big dog, and the only advantage in being a big dog is that one is not then ashamed of dying. Not even a big dog can help feeling shamed of living, a big dog least of all.”

“Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.”

“I accept differences of cultures in all countries. But unfortunately, cows are grown to be eaten, dogs are not. I accept that many people eat beef, but a cultured country does not allow its people to eat dogs.”

“When I see a kid I see a dog.”

“He told them it was only dogs that bark and go for strange dogs, and men set on a dog because it suits them to show that they are still masters, but if the dogs weren't dumb animals they would come to an agreements with each other and start barking at them.”

“The dog always dies. Go to the library and pick out a book with an award sticker and a dog on the cover. Trust me, that dog is going down.”

“The tree looks like a dog, barking at heaven.”