“Grandma Redbird: Honey, you have to move past this.
Zoey: How Grandma?
Grandma Redbird: By living the life she'd be proud of you for living.”

“I want to kill Grandma? It’s not respectful to say someone wants to kill Grandma when I spent sixteen years of my life putting my life on the line to protect Grandma.”

“Lies don't fix things. They don't even make things easier, at least not in the long run. Best to tell the truth then clean up an honest mess" P. C. Cast ( Grandma Redbird)… So wish People would understand this!!”

“The dog ran into the kitchen, stuck his nose in Grandma's crotch, and snuffled.
Dang," Grandma said. "Guess my new perfume really works. I'm gonna have to try it out at the seniors meeting.”

“… For all the days of our lives," we finished and I felt a little like a character in one of my grandma's soap operas…”

“I was watching television and I saw how you stick your fingers in a person's eyes to slow them down."
Grandma Mazur”

“So, if you have a grandma, thank the good Lord above, and give your grandmamma hugs and kisses, for grandmothers are to love.”

“I shot that sucker right in the gumpy."
Grandma Mazur”

“I like having a puppy that's a bulldog, 'cause it's like having a baby that is also a grandma.”

“That man is such a damn turd monkey."
"Grandma!" I said.
"Oh, Zoeybird, did I call your mother's husband a damn turd monkey out loud?"
"Yes, Grandma, you did."
She looked at me, her dark eyes sparkling. "Good.”