John Gray (terapeuta) cytaty strona 6

„Na szczęście między tym, co przeżywamy, a doskonałością jest wiele miejsca na… rozwój.”

Zakochani Marsjanie i Wenusjanki

„Narzekanie mężczyzny oznacza, że zastanawia się nad spełnieniem kobiecej prośby.”

Mężczyźni są z Marsa, kobiety z Wenus

„Miłość może trwać całe życie, ale wymaga ciągłej rezygnacji z wyobrażeń o tym, jaki powinien być nasz partner, akceptacji jego postępowania oraz nieustających starań o lepsze zrozumienie.”

„Kobiety znajdują motywację i siłę do działania, kiedy są otoczone czułą opieką.”

Zakochani Marsjanie i Wenusjanki

John Gray (terapeuta) Cytaty o kobietach

„Zarówno mężczyźni, jak i kobiety posługują się językiem w celu stwierdzenia faktów lub rozwiązywania problemów, lecz kobiety używają języka również po to, aby przekonać się, co chcą powiedzieć (…).”

„Kobiety używają języka podobnie jak mężczyźni, aby stwierdzać fakty i rozwiązywać problemy. Jednak mówią również, aby odkryć, co chcą powiedzieć; czasami nazywają swoje uczucia, aby je uporządkować i dzięki temu poczuć się lepiej.”

Zakochani Marsjanie i Wenusjanki

„Człowiek zadowala się ciszą tylko wtedy, gdy prawda jest zbyt okrutna, aby można było ją przyjąć.”

Zakochani Marsjanie i Wenusjanki

John Gray (terapeuta) cytaty

„Czasami klęska może się okazać zamaskowanym błogosławieństwem.”

Zakochani Marsjanie i Wenusjanki

„Mężczyzna wciąż oscyluje między potrzebą bliskości i tęsknotą do niezależności.”

Zakochani Marsjanie i Wenusjanki

„Stanowcze „nie” wobec egoistycznych zachowań może wydawać się bezlitosne, lecz pozwalanie komuś, aby ciągle nas ranił, nie jest przejawem miłości.”

„Problemy w intymnych związkach są doświadczeniem skazującym chyba na największą samotność.”

Zakochani Marsjanie i Wenusjanki

„Każda przesada w postępowaniu jest w istocie wyrazem stłumionego kiedyś bólu.”

Zakochani Marsjanie i Wenusjanki

„Sekret „podbudowania” mężczyzny leży w tym, by pod żadnym pozorem nie starać się go zmienić.”

Mężczyźni są z Marsa, kobiety z Wenus

“For those who live inside a myth, it seems a self-evident fact. Human progress is a fact of this kind. If you accept it you have a place in the grand march of humanity. Humankind is, of course, not marching anywhere. ‘Humanity’ is a fiction composed from billions of individuals for each of whom life is singular and final. But the myth of progress is extremely potent. When it loses its power those who have lived by it are – as Conrad put it, describing Kayerts and Carlier – ‘like those lifelong prisoners who, liberated after many years, do not know what use to make of their freedoms’. When faith in the future is taken from them, so is the image they have of themselves. If they then opt for death, it is because without that faith they can no longer make sense of living.”

John Gray (terapeuta): Cytaty po angielsku

“It is because human needs are contradictory that no human life can be perfect. That does not mean that human life is imperfect. It means that the idea of perfection has no meaning.”

An Old Chaos: The Call of Progress (pp. 6-7)
The Silence of Animals: On Progress and Other Modern Myths (2013)

“In thinking of history in this [progressive & eschatological] way Islam shares common ground with Christianity and with the secular creeds of the modern West. It is misleading to represent Islam and ‘the West’ as forming civilisations that have nothing in common. Christianity and Islam are integral parts of western monotheism, and as such they share a view of history that marks them off from the rest of the world. Both are militant faiths that seek to convert all humankind. Other religions have been implicated in twentieth-century violence—the state cult of Shintō in Japan during the militarist period and Hindu nationalism in contemporary India, for example. But only Christianity and Islam have engendered movements that are committed to the systematic use of force to achieve universal goals.”

'Modus Vivendi' (p.29)
Gray's Anatomy: Selected Writings (2009)

“Human rights are not just cultural or legal constructions, as fashionable western relativists are fond of claiming. They are universal values. To deny the benefits of the new regime of rights to other cultures is to patronise them in a way that is reminiscent of the colonial era. If the new regime on torture is good enough for the US, who can say that it is not good for everyone?”

John Gray książka Black Mass: Apocalyptic Religion and the Death of Utopia

Enlightenment and Terror in the Twentieth Century: Terror and the Western Tradition
Black Mass: Apocalyptic Religion and the Death of Utopia (2007)

“Our lives are more like fragmentary dreams than the enactments of conscious selves. We control very little of what we most care about; many of our most fateful decisions are made unbeknownst to ourselves. Yet we insist that mankind can achieve what we cannot: conscious mastery of its existence. This is the creed of those who have given up an irrational belief in God for an irrational faith in mankind.”

A Modest Proposal (2003)

“Rather than trying to escape violence, human beings more often become habituated to it. History abounds with long conflicts – the Thirty Years’ War in early seventeenth-century Europe, the Time of Troubles in Russia, twentieth-century guerrilla conflicts – in which continuous slaughter has been accepted as normal. Famously adaptable, the human animal quickly learns to live with violence and soon comes to find satisfaction in it.”

John Gray książka Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals

The Deception: At the Masked Ball (p. 38)
Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals (2002)

“A lover who promises eternal fidelity is more likely to be believed if he believes his promise himself; he is no more likely to keep the promise.”

In the Puppet Theatre: Roof Gardens, Feathers and Human Sacrifice (p. 80)
The Soul of the Marionette: A Short Enquiry into Human Freedom (2015)

“As Malaparte saw it, Naples was a pagan city with an ancient sense of time. Christianity taught those who were converted to it to think of history as the unfolding of a single plot – a moral drama of sin and redemption. In the ancient world there was no such plot – only a multitude of stories that were forever being repeated. Inhabiting that ancient world, the Neapolitans did not expect any fundamental alteration in human affairs. Not having accepted the Christian story of redemption, they had not been seduced by the myth of progress. Never having believed civilization to be permanent, they were not surprised when it foundered.”

John Gray książka Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals

The Human: Truth and Consequences (p. 27)
Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals (2002)

“Neither in the ancient pagan world nor in any other culture has human history ever been thought to have an overarching significance. In Greece and Rome, it was a series of natural cycles of growth and decline. In India, it was a collective dream, endlessly repeated. The idea that history must make sense is just a Christian prejudice. If you believe that humans are animals, there can be no such thing as the history of humanity, only the lives of particular humans. If we speak of the history of the species at all, it is only to signify the unknowable sum of these lives. As with other animals, some lives are happy, others wretched. None has a meaning that lies beyond itsel£. Looking for meaning in history is like looking for patterns in clouds.”

An Old Chaos: Frozen Horses and Deserts of Brick (p. 22)
The Silence of Animals: On Progress and Other Modern Myths (2013)

“Human beings act, certainly. But none of them knows why they act as they do. There is a scattering of facts, which can be known and reported. Beyond these facts are the stories that are told. Human beings may behave like puppets, but no one is pulling the strings.”

John Gray książka Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals

The Deception: Nietzsche's Optimism (p.47-8)
Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals (2002)

“Today everyone knows that inequality is wrong. A century ago everyone knew that gay sex was wrong. The intuitions people have on moral questions are intensely felt. They are also shallow and transient to the last degree…. Justice is an artefact of custom. Where customs are unsettled its dictates soon become dated. Ideas of justice are as timeless as fashion in hats.”

In The Puppet Theatre: Puppetry, Conspiracy and Ouija Boards (p. 136)
The Soul of the Marionette: A Short Enquiry into Human Freedom (2015)

“Humans kill one another – and in some cases themselves – for many reasons, but none is more human than the attempt to make sense of their lives. More than the loss of life, they fear loss of meaning.”

John Gray książka Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals

The Vices of Morality: Justice and Fashion (p. 102-3)
Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals (2002)

“According to the most influential twentieth-century philosopher of science, Karl Popper, a theory is scientific only in so far as it is falsifiable, and should be given up as soon as it has been falsified. By this standard, the theories of Darwin and Einstein should never have been accepted.”

In the Puppet Theatre: Roof Gardens, Feathers and Human Sacrifice (p. 87)
The Soul of the Marionette: A Short Enquiry into Human Freedom (2015)

“Progress in civilization seems possible only in interludes when history is idling.”

John Gray książka Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals

The Human: Science's Irrational Origins (p. 22)
Straw Dogs: Thoughts on Humans and Other Animals (2002)