“It should not be an act of social disobedience to light a cigarette… unless you're actually a doctor working at an incubator.”

“Human history began with an act of disobedience, and it is not unlikely that it will be terminated by an act of obedience.”

“Disobedience to authority is one of the most natural and healthy acts.”

“The family unit is the incubator for human character; the state is the incubator for human dependency.”

“(Sebastian) "See, there you go. You're always looking at me like that."
"Like what?"
"Like I burn down animal shelters for fun and light my cigarettes with orphans.”

“Be warned, therefore, that one does not go to hell to light a cigarette.”

“Ah! American cigarettes are like the American soul - sweet and light.”

“Besides, when not hard at work with this research, I'm actually conducting a side experiment on how cigarettes and gin increase charisma. As you might guess, the results are looking very promising.”

“Ted said, "You're working for the Order now." "Yes." "How does it feel?" "Well, Doctor, it feels rather sore and tingly.”

“I regard this novel as a work without redeeming social value, unless it can be recycled as a cardboard box.”