Terry Pratchett: Trending quotes (page 16)

“It wasn't that Nanny Ogg sang badly. It was just that she could hit notes which, when amplified by a tin bath half full of water, ceased to be sound and became some sort of invasive presence.”

“People were people, even if they had four legs and had called themselves names like Dangerous Beans, which is the kind of name you gave yourself if you learned to read before you understood what all the words actually meant.”

“Trouble is, just because things are obvious doesn't mean they're true.”

“Hat = wizard, wizard = hat. Everything else is frippery.”

“YOU HAVE TO START OUT LEARNING TO BELIEVE THE LITTLE LIES.

"So we can believe the big ones?"

YES. JUSTICE. MERCY. DUTY. THAT SORT OF THING.”

“Money doesn't buy happiness, Gytha."
"I only wanted to rent it for a few weeks!”

“I see evil when I look in my shaving mirror. It is, philosophically, present everywhere in the universe in order, apparently, to highlight the existence of good. I think there is more to this theory, but I tend to burst out laughing at this point.”

“There’s lots of people will help you with alcohol business, but there’s no one out there arranging little meetings where you can stand up and say, ‘My name is Sam Vimes and I’m a really suspicious bastard.”

“The only really sane person in there is Igor, and possibly the turnip. And I'm not sure about the turnip.”

“Personal isn't the same as important.”

“Things are not as they seem. They are what they are.”

“They say that the prospect of being hanged in the morning concentrates a man's mind wonderfully; unfortunately, what the mind inevitably concentrates on is that, in the morning, it will be in a body that is going to be hanged.”

“Ninety percent of true love is acute, ear-burning embarrassment.”

“Raising the flag and singing the anthem are, while somewhat suspicious, not in themselves acts of treason.”

“Vimes had got around to a Clean Desk policy. It was a Clean Floor strategy
that eluded him at the moment.”

“They can tak' oour lives but they canna tak' oour troousers!”

“It is well known that a vital ingredient of success is not knowing that what you're attempting can't be done. A person ignorant of the possibility of failure can be a half-brick in the path of the bicycle of history.”

“Thunder rolled.. It rolled a six.”

“I'm trying to have a moment o' existential dreed here, right? Crivens, it's a puir lookout if a man canna feel the chilly winds o' fate lashing aroound his netheres wi'out folks telling him he's deid, eh?”