Quotes from book
Night Watch

Night Watch
Terry Pratchett

Night Watch is a fantasy novel by British writer Terry Pratchett, the 29th book in his Discworld series, published in 2002. The protagonist of the novel is Sir Samuel Vimes, commander of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch. A five-part radio adaptation of the novel was broadcast on BBC Radio 4. Night Watch placed second in the annual Locus Poll for best fantasy novel.

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“No! Please! I'll tell you whatever you want to know!" the man yelled.
"Really?" said Vimes. "What's the orbital velocity of the moon?"
"What?"
"Oh, you'd like something simpler?”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“That's the way it was. Privilege, which just means 'private law.' Two types of people laugh at the law; those that break it and those that make it.”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“Well done,' said a voice somewhere behind him. 'Consciousness to sarcasm in five seconds!”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“The key to winning, as always, was looking as if you had every right, nay, duty to be where you were. It helped if you could also suggest in every line of your body that no one else had any rights to be doing anything, anywhere, whatsoever.”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“There was no universe, anywhere, where a Sam Vimes would give in on this, because if he did then he wouldn't be Sam Vimes anymore.”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“Yeah, all right, but everyone knows they torture people," mumbled Sam.
"Do they?" said Vimes. "Then why doesn't anyone do anything about it?"
"'cos they torture people.”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“Hat = wizard, wizard = hat. Everything else is frippery.”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“Raising the flag and singing the anthem are, while somewhat suspicious, not in themselves acts of treason.”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“Truth! Freedom! Justice! And a hard-boiled egg!”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“His movements could be called cat-like, except that he did not stop to spray urine up against things.”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“Two types of people laugh at the law: those that break it and those that make it.”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“You just put that sword away, sir, please," said the voice of Lance-Constable Vimes.
"You will not shoot me, you young idiot. That would be murder," said the captain calmly.
"Not where I'm aiming, sir.”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“In the words of the philosopher Sceptum, the founder of my profession: am I going to get paid for this?”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“An Assassin, a real Assassin, had to look like one - black clothes, hood, boots, and all. If they could wear any clothes, any disguise, then what could anyone do but spend all day in a small room with a loaded crossbow pointed at the door?”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“What did I tell you about Mister Safety Catch?' said Vimes weakly.
When Mister Safety Catch Is Not On, Mister Crossbow Is Not Your Friend,' recited Detritus, saluting.”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

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“I get it,' said the prisoner. 'Good Cop, Bad Cop, eh?'
If you like.' said Vimes. 'But we're a bit short staffed here, so if I give you a cigarette would you mind kicking yourself in the teeth?”

Terry Pratchett book Night Watch

Source: Night Watch

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