Quotes from book
Hogfather

Hogfather

Terry Pratchett

Hogfather is the 20th Discworld novel by Terry Pratchett, and a 1997 British Fantasy Award nominee. It was first released in 1996 and published by Victor Gollancz. It came in 137th place in The Big Read, a BBC survey of the most loved British books of all time, making it one of fifteen books by Pratchett in the Top 200.The book focuses on the absence of the Hogfather, a mythical creature akin to Father Christmas, who grants children's wishes on Hogswatchnight and brings them presents. While Death attempts to fill in for the Hogfather, his granddaughter Susan Sto Helit tries to find and rescue the Hogfather.

“HUMAN BEINGS MAKE LIFE SO INTERESTING. DO YOU KNOW, THAT IN A UNIVERSE SO FULL OF WONDERS, THEY HAVE MANAGED TO INVENT BOREDOM. (Death)”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“NAUGHTY AND NICE? said Death. BUT IT'S EASY TO BE NICE IF YOU'RE RICH. IS THIS FAIR?
Albert wanted to argue. He wanted to say, Really? In that case, how come so many of the rich buggers is bastards? And being poor don't mean being naughty, neither.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“The Auditors fluttered anxiously. And, as always happens in their species when something goes radically wrong and needs fixing instantly, they settled down to try to work how who was to blame.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“Credulous: having views about the world, the universe and humanity's place in it that are shared only by very unsophisticated people and the most intelligent and advanced mathematicians and physicists.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“YOU HAVE TO START OUT LEARNING TO BELIEVE THE LITTLE LIES.

"So we can believe the big ones?"

YES. JUSTICE. MERCY. DUTY. THAT SORT OF THING.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“It was nice to hear the voices of little children at play, provided you took care to be far enough away not to hear what they were actually saying.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“OH, THERE HAS TO BE SOMETHING IN THE STOCKING THAT MAKES A NOISE, said Death. OTHERWISE, WHAT IS 4:30 A. M. FOR?”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“IT'S THE EXPRESSION ON THEIR LITTLE FACES I LIKE, said the Hogfather.
"You mean sort of fear and awe and not knowing whether to laugh or cry or wet their pants?"
YES. NOW THAT IS WHAT I CALL BELIEF.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“They always gives me bath salts," complained Nobby. "And bath soap and bubble bath and herbal bath lumps and tons of bath stuff and I can't think why, 'cos it's not as if I hardly ever has a bath. You'd think they'd take the hint, wouldn't you?”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“The philosopher Didactylos has summed up an alternative hypothesis as "Things just happen. What the hell".”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“DO I DETECT A NOTE OF UNSEASONAL GRUMPINESS? said Death. NO SUGAR PIGGYWIGGY FOR YOU, ALBERT.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“The phrase 'Someone ought to do something' was not, by itself, a helpful one. People who used itadded the rider 'and that someone is me'.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“Hello, inner child, I'm the inner babysitter!”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“Susan says, don't get afraid, get angry.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“You can't give her that!' she screamed. 'It's not safe!'
IT'S A SWORD, said the Hogfather. THEY'RE NOT MEANT TO BE SAFE.
'She's a child!' shouted Crumley.
IT'S EDUCATIONAL.
'What if she cuts herself?'
THAT WILL BE AN IMPORTANT LESSON.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

Terry Pratchett quote: “There is always time for another last minute”

“There is always time for another last minute”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“Mister Teatime had a truly brilliant mind, but it was brilliant like a fractured mirror, all marvellous facets and rainbows but, ultimately, also something that was broken.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“She'd become a governess. It was one of the few jobs a known lady could do.
And she'd taken to it well. She'd sworn that if she did indeed ever find
herself dancing on rooftops with chimney sweeps she'd beat herself to death with her own umbrella.”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

“Some things are fairly obvious when it's a seven-foot skeleton with a scythe telling you them”

Terry Pratchett book Hogfather

Source: Hogfather

Similar authors

Terry Pratchett photo

Terry Pratchett796

English author 1948–2015

P.G. Wodehouse photo

P.G. Wodehouse302

English author None

A.A. Milne photo

A.A. Milne169

British author None

George Orwell photo

George Orwell473

English author and journalist None

T.S. Eliot photo

T.S. Eliot270

20th century English author None

Aldous Huxley photo

Aldous Huxley290

English writer None

Douglas Adams photo

Douglas Adams317

English writer and humorist None

Kazuo Ishiguro photo

Kazuo Ishiguro76

Japanese-born British author None

Jerome K. Jerome photo

Jerome K. Jerome87

English humorist None

John Galsworthy photo

John Galsworthy48

English novelist and playwright None

Similar authors

Terry Pratchett photo

Terry Pratchett796

English author 1948–2015

P.G. Wodehouse photo

P.G. Wodehouse302

English author None

A.A. Milne photo

A.A. Milne169

British author None

George Orwell photo

George Orwell473

English author and journalist None

T.S. Eliot photo

T.S. Eliot270

20th century English author None