Maddox: Want

“"How can a movie be "one of the best"? There's only one "best" movie, so saying something is "one of the best" is stupid and doesn't make sense. Technically any movie that's not the worst could be considered "one of the best." Imagine that, another empty phrase used by marketing people. I want to punch someone in the throat."”

Maddox

Hollywood: still out of ideas? How about another black-guy-meets-white-guy comedy http://maddox.xmission.com/cop_movie.html
The Best Page in the Universe

People , Stupidity , Imagination , Sense

“That reminds me of how much I hate babies. Why does everyone want to save them? There are too many babies. I'm not saying we should kill them, but if you happen to be giving your baby a bath and the phone rings.. well, nobody will judge you. Besides, you might get free brownies out of it at the funeral, and brownies rule.”

Maddox

The Best Page in the Universe

Hate , Baby

“Fernando is wanted for 'murder with a deadly weapon' according to the FBI website. As opposed to being wanted for murder with a non-deadly weapon?”

Maddox

The Best Page in the Universe

“I was going to write about how I was going to take away women's right to vote, but that one is pretty obvious since nobody wants women to vote, except for women, and they don't count.”

Maddox

Looking for a safe stance on abortion? Me neither. http://maddox.xmission.com/c.cgi?u=regressive
The Best Page in the Universe

Women

“There aren't many things I don't want to experience in life, but the sensual caress of a parent going through mid-life crisis is one of them.”

Maddox

The Best Page in the Universe

Life , Parent

“"4 example the other day i saw a black person walking down the street and i was like "omg a negro" but instead of walking on the other side i said "what would rumsfeld do?" so i stayed on the sidewalk. when he came up to me i wanted to show him that i have no problems with people of color so i said "hey" and offered him my spare change before he could even ask."”

Maddox

i love donald rumsfeld http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=af_racist
The Best Page in the Universe, April Fools

People , Color , Problem , Change

“Elizabeth Duke is possibly the only person on the FBI list wanted for communism.”

Maddox

What a bitch! Duke was a member of the extremist group, May 19th Communist Organization, whose objective was the violent overthrow of the US. The group was largely active from 1978 to 1985, at which time they got busted and thrown in jail where their new objective became to prevent any violent uprisings in their ass. She's the only one still around. It's not really a group anymore if it's just you, dipshit! America wins."
The Best Page in the Universe

Personality , Communication