Quotes from book
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Laurence Sterne

The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman, also known as just Tristram Shandy, is a novel by Laurence Sterne. It was published in nine volumes, the first two appearing in 1759, and seven others following over the next seven years . It purports to be a biography of the eponymous character. Its style is marked by digression, double entendre, and graphic devices.

“I begin with writing the first
sentence—and trusting to Almighty
God for the second.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Source: The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

“Keyholes are the occasions of more sin and wickedness, than all other holes in this world put together.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Source: The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

“Trust that man in nothing who has not a conscience in everything.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book II, Ch. 17.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“Shall we for ever make new books, as apothecaries make new mixtures, by pouring only out of one vessel into another?”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Source: The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

“Human nature is the same in all professions.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Source: The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

“I wish either my father or my mother, or indeed both of them, as they were in duty both equally bound to it, had minded what they were about when they begot me.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book I (1760), Ch. 1.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“My father was as proud of his eloquence as MARCUS TULLIUS CICERO could be for his life, and and for aught I am convinced of to the contrary at present, with as much reason: it was indeed his strength — and his weakness, too. — His strength — for he was by nature eloquent — and his weakness — for he was hourly a dupe to it; and provided an occasion in life would but permit him to shew his talents, or say either a wise thing, a witty, or a shrewd one — (bating the case of a systematic misfortune)— he had all he wanted.— A blessing which tied up my father's tongue, and a misfortune which let it loose with a good grace, were pretty equal: sometimes, indeed, the misfortune was the better of the two; for instance, where the pleasure of the harangue was as ten, and the pain of the misfortune was as five”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

my father gained half in half, and consequently was as well again off, as if it had never befallen him.
Book V, Ch. 3.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“I believe in my conscience I intercept many a thought which heaven intended for another man.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book VIII, Ch. 2.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“Ho! 'tis the time of salads.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book VII, Ch. 17.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“The desire of knowledge, like the thirst of riches, increases ever with the acquisition of it.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book II (1760), Ch. 3.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“I am convinced, Yorick, continued my father, half reading and half discoursing, that there is a Northwest Passage to the intellectual world; and that the soul of man has shorter ways of going to work, in furnishing itself with knowledge and instruction, than we generally take with it.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book V, Ch. 42.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“Our armies swore terribly in Flanders, cried my uncle Toby, — but nothing to this. — For my own part, I could not have a heart to curse my dog so.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book III, Ch. 11.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“Shall we be destined to the days of eternity, on holy-days, as well as working-days, to be showing the relics of learning, as monks do the relics of their saints — without working one — one single miracle with them?”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book V (1761-1762), Ch. 1.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“Tis known by the name of perseverance in a good cause — and of obstinacy in a bad one.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book I, Ch. 17.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“As for the clergy — No — If I say a word against them, I'll be shot. — I have no desire, — and besides, if I had, — I durst not for my soul touch upon the subject, — with such weak nerves and spirits, and in the condition I am in at present, 'twould be as much as my life was worth, to deject and contrist myself with so bad and melancholy an account, — and therefore, 'tis safer to draw a curtain across, and hasten from it, as fast as I can, to the main and principal point I have undertaken to clear up, — and that is, How it comes to pass, that your men of least wit are reported to be men of most judgment.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book III, Ch. 20.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“Persuasion hung upon his lips, and the elements of Logick and Rhetorick were so blended up in him, — and, withall, he had so shrewd guess at the weaknesses and passions of his respondent, — that NATURE might have stood up and said, — "This man is eloquent."”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book I, Ch. 19.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“Go poor Devil, get thee gone, why should I hurt thee? — This world surely is wide enough to hold both thee and me.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book II, Ch. 12 (Uncle Toby to the fly).
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“Whistled up to London, upon a Tom Fool's errand.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book I, Ch. 16.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“"Pray, my dear," quoth my mother, "have you not forgot to wind up the clock?" — "Good G—!" cried my father, making an exclamation, but taking care to moderate his voice at the same time, — "Did ever woman, since the creation of the world, interrupt a man with such a silly question?"”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book I, Ch. 1.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

“The history of a soldier's wound beguiles the pain of it.”

Laurence Sterne book The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman

Book I, Ch. 25.
The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman (1760-1767)

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