Quotes from book

Snow Flower and the Secret Fan

“The classics tell us that, in relationships, the one between teacher and student comes second only to the one between parent and child.”

“In our country we call this type of mother love teng ai. My son has told me that in men's writing it is composed of two characters. The first means pain; the second means love. That is a mother's love.”

“I am old enough to know only too well my good and bad qualities, which were often one in the same.”

“In every message she spoke of birds, of flight, of the world away. Even back then, she flew against what was presented to her. I wanted to cling to her wings and soar, no matter how intimidated I was.”

“There is no life without death. That is the true meaning of yin and yang”

“Anyone who says that women do not have influence in men's decisions makes a vast and stupid mistake.”

“For my entire life I longed for love. I knew it was not right for me — as a girl and later as a woman — to want or expect it, but I did, and this unjustified desire has been at the root of every problem I have experienced in my life.”

“You may be desperate, but never let anyone see you as anything less than a cultivated woman.”

“Obey, obey, obey, then do what you want.”