“And once I shagged Regan on a platter of pork in front of Muslims.”

“The family connection with the Hindu Holy of Holies (Benares) was apparent in the many Hindu traditions and customs observed in our house-hold. Beef was as taboo as pork was and Divali used to be observed with Divas, as indeed several other Hindu festivals. The orthodox Muslims looked askance at us and we merited Iqbal’s couplet: "The orthodox preacher considers me as an Unbeliever and Unbleiver thinks I am a Muslim."”

“I think the apostates, the intellectuals, the women, the gays of the Muslim world are the most important people in the world right now. If we could give greencards to every real secularist in the Muslim world, I think they should just get to the front of the line. These are the people who need to be empowered. The irony is that if they could leave the Muslim world… The Muslim world needs them, so the best thing would be to empower them in the Muslim world. […] Everything I say about Islam is a confession of solidarity with these people.”

“I was once walking through the forest alone. A tree fell right in front of me, and I didn't hear a thing.”

“Never in the history of the world has an alien ruler granted self-rule to a people on a silver platter.”

“It doesn't seem to matter what we think… The prince will come up here and look at us as if we're barrels in a trader's wagon. And if I'm salt pork and he doesn't care for salt pork, then there's nothing I can do.”

“This is worse than Hollywood, he thought. A girl comes in with a pork chop and I write a song for her.”

“Donald has consistently insulted Muslims abroad, Muslims at home, when we need to be cooperating with Muslim nations and with the American Muslim community. They're on the front lines. They can provide information to us that we might not get anywhere else. They need to have close working cooperation with law enforcement in these communities, not be alienated and pushed away as some of Donald's rhetoric, unfortunately, has led to.”

“The moon was turned toward me,
Like a platter made of gold,
My death, it almost bored me,
So often was it told.”

“I reached over and squeezed Curran’s hand. “Come on, you, me, a platter of barely seared meat, it will be great. If we see the navigators, we can make fun of the way they hold their forks.”