“Let's go out and buy a statistically average meal from a large multinational restaurant chain. That usually fixes about seventy-five percent of life's problems.”

“People learn twenty-five percent from their teacher, twenty-five percent from listening to themselves, twenty-five percent from their friends, and twenty-five percent from time.”

“you fix what you can fix and you let the rest go. If there ain't nothin to be done about it it aint even a problem. It's just a aggravation.”

“Let's worry about fixing the problem instead of the blame.”

“Seventy million people will talk about seventy million solutions to the same problem.”

“In a real battle, atemi is seventy percent, technique is thirty percent.”

“No statements of mere averages... are of the least avail against our statistics. Fluctuations from the averages are the sole reliable test...”

“Statistically speaking, there is a 65 percent chance that the love of your life is having an affair. Be very suspicious.”

“I've got maybe five or ten jean jackets with jeans. I can pack three to four pairs of denim jeans, five T-shirts, ten Western-style shirts, and two ties and just buy socks when I get there. That, a Walkman, two books, and some records, and I'm out the door for a year. Not a problem. Doesn't freak me out at all. Usually, if you're thinking about your clothes too much, you're probably not high enough.”

“When poets — write about food it is usually celebratory. Food as the thing-in-itself, but also the thoughtful preparation of meals, the serving of meals, meals communally shared: a sense of the sacred in the profane.”