“You know, Jacob, if it weren't for the fact that we're natural enemies and that you're also trying to steal away the reason for my existence, I might actually like you."
"Maybe…if you weren't a disgusting vampire who was planning to suck out the life of the girl I love…well, no, not even then.”

“Hell, I might be president now if it weren't for the fact I said I had an uncle who was a coal miner. Turns out I didn't have anybody in the coal mines, you know what I mean? I tried that crap — it didn't work.”

“Well, that's history for you, folks. Unfair, untrue and for the most part written by folk who weren't even there.”

“People just weren't interesting. Maybe they weren't supposed to be. But animals, birds, even insects were. I couldn't understand it.”

“Sir, the fact that the book is in a public library brings no comfort. Books are the one element in which I am personally and nakedly acquisitive. If it weren't for the law I would steal them. If it weren't for my purse I would buy them.”

“After all, who knows what the distant past was like? About Kepler and Copernicus, people often say, You captured the period so well! I always want to ask, How do you know? You weren't there either.”

“I'm a-gonna tell you how it's gonna be,
You're gonna give your love to me.
I wanna love you night and day,
You know my love a-not fade away.
A-well, you know my love a-not fade away.”

“You always wanted to make it clear you weren't like the rest of us. You're still doing it.”

“Well I woke up this mornin' it was Christmas Day
And the birds were singing the night away
I saw my stocking lying on the chair
Looked right to the bottom but you weren't there”

“You weren't an accident. You weren't mass produced. You aren't an assembly-line product. You were deliberately planned, specifically gifted, and lovingly positioned on the earth by the Master Craftsman.”