“I don't celebrate Halloween because of what it means. Because it is a Satanic holiday, it is a pagan holiday, and while people are going around getting free candy, people are falling victims to human sacrifices and things like that. That's the reality of what's going on on Halloween.”

“I don't consider myself a great singer--but I have a connection with the audience. There's the artist, and then a void and the audience; but I like to be part of the audience. I'd like to be them, and I'd like them to be me for an hour and a half. I get criticized for being the antichrist, causing kids to commit suicide, but that's total bullsh-t. My intentions are not that. Every year they have Halloween, and all I do is take Halloween night out on the road every night. It's like a Halloween party every night. If that was the case on Halloween night, the police cells would be full--everyone would have turned Satanic for the night!”

“Someone once asked me what my working timetable was like and when was the last time I went on a holiday. I said about 20 years back. I don’t work anymore, because I get paid to do what I like most. So it’s like a paid holiday.”

“I like Halloween, you people like Halloween? [Audience cheers] I love it, too. My brother got in trouble last Halloween for toilet-papering people's houses. He said, "Dude, I didn't know that was illegal!" I said, "It ain't, but you are supposed to use fresh toilet paper. Pull your pants up and stop pooping in those pumpkins, too! For God's sake, you're the sheriff!"”

“Right. Because there’s no bigger sign of commitment than a Halloween dance”

“Scaring the children: for Halloween last night, I dressed as a Democrat and when kids came to my door, I took half of their candy!”

“Halloween seems to last forever, until it is finally time to put on one's costume and demand candy from strangers.”

“I'm actually going on holiday to India next month, and I wanted to know what the weather was gonna be like there, so I phoned my bank.”

“I work just as hard as any other actress around my age, like Scarlett Johansson, but I just don't get the opportunities that they get because people are so distracted by the mess that I created in my life. But that doesn't mean it's going to last forever.”

“I think holidays create so much pressure because people feel they should be having a good time. But you shouldn't.”