“I like Halloween, you people like Halloween? [Audience cheers] I love it, too. My brother got in trouble last Halloween for toilet-papering people's houses. He said, "Dude, I didn't know that was illegal!" I said, "It ain't, but you are supposed to use fresh toilet paper. Pull your pants up and stop pooping in those pumpkins, too! For God's sake, you're the sheriff!"”

—  Larry the Cable Guy

Tailgate Party (2009)

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Larry the Cable Guy photo
Larry the Cable Guy38
American stand-up comedian, actor, country music artist, vo… 1963

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