“I'm sure Chelsea do not like playing Liverpool. When they are talking and talking and talking before the game it means they are worried. Maybe they're afraid?”

“I mean, what do people talk about when they're married?" "Their kids, I guess." "Maybe that's all they have in common.”

“This may sound a little West Texan to you, but I like it. When I'm talking about.. when I'm talking about myself, and when he's talking about myself, all of us are talking about me.”

“Well they're breaking down doors in foreign countries,
Everybody thinks somebody's hiding something.
There's talk on the street and the nation is worried.
But you can't talk back when you're dead, when you're dead and buried.”

“Do I have to talk to insane people?"
"You're a librarian now. I'm afraid it's mandatory.”

“When they talk about drugs, they don't talk about all of them. They never mention coffee. The low end of the speed spectrum, I grant you, but there are coffee freaks. And they're walking around, nobody worrying about it.”

“A black man would never dream of talking to the police high. That's a waste of weed. I'm serious. I mean, I'd be scared to talk to the police when I'm sleepy.”

“The first thing you have to do if you want to raise nice kids, is you have to talk to them like they are people instead of talking to them like they're property.”

“I worry that Jesus drinks himself to sleep when he hears me talk like this.”

“"It's the Game!" (when talking about Triple H)”