“…But I saw today there was one thing unforgivable - like things in the school-room, so bad they were unpunishable, that only mummy could deal with - the bad thing I was on the point of doing, that I'm not quite bad enough to do; to set up a rival good to God's.”

“I do not say whether it is a good or bad thing. To do so would be meaningless and arrogant.”

“Sometimes because I'm sad I do bad things.
I can't tell you what they are.
They are too bad. And it's not fair on the cat.”

“This is not going to be easy. I'm good at being bad, but I'm bad at being good. I don't know the first thing about good deeds.”

“Sometimes there are good reasons to do bad things.”

“It was amazing how many friends you could make by being bad at things, provided you were bad enough to be funny.”

“bad things, like good things don't happen any more often than they ought to by chance. the universe has no mind, no feelings, and no personality, so it doesn't do things in order to either hurt or please you. bad things happen because things happen.”

“Just because I don't do bad things doesn't mean I don't have bad thoughts.”

“If only it were that easy. You forget: I have an addictive personality. I'm addicted to you. Somehow I think you could do all sorts of bad things to me, and I'd still come back to you.”

“The world is full of good people who do bad things!”