“What would a chair look like if your knees bent the other way?”

— Steven Wright

Last update June 3, 2021. History

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Steven Wright 178

American actor and author 1955

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“Have you noticed that whatever sport you're trying to learn, some earnest person is always telling you to keep your knees bent?”

Dave Barry (1947) American writer

“Just because the only way you can maintain control over your bodily passions is to sit straight in your chair, knees together, hands delicately arranged in our lap, fingers tightly intertwined, does not mean that I am required to do the same.”

Orson Scott Card (1951) American science fiction novelist

Source: The Tales of Alvin Maker, Seventh Son (1987), Chapter 13.

“Taking the knee' is like taking a pee. It's a waste. It speaks to the inward-looking, ego-driven, vain posturing of the Left and its perpetually seething, predatory racial coalition. They're bent on extracting something from innocent, ordinary Americans who owe them nothing.”

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" The Tribalism of Kneelism http://dailycaller.com/2017/09/29/the-tribalism-of-kneelism/," The Daily Caller, September 29, 2017.
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“There's no way I'll back down, like a goddamn coward. I can't, how would I look? As a man bowing to his knees? Like the mad cow disease, let somebody lash out at me, and not lash back out at him.”

Eminem (1972) American rapper and actor

"Don't Push Me", Get Rich or Die Tryin (2003).
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“What would your good do if evil didn't exist, and what would the earth look like if all the shadows disappeared?”

Mikhail Bulgakov (1891–1940) Russian author primarily known for his novel "Master and Margarita"

“Alternate form: I would think that if you understood what communism was, you would hope and pray on your knees that we would someday be communists. I am a socialist. I think that we should strive toward a socialist society - all the way to communism.”

Jane Fonda (1937) American actress and activist

Reported by Paul Scott in the Lewiston Daily Sun (27 September 1972) again as remarks at Duke University; http://news.google.com/newspapers?id=FXwgAAAAIBAJ&sjid=7mcFAAAAIBAJ&pg=1010,3814989 reported elsewhere as a remark made at Michigan State University (22 November 1970) and cited to the Detroit Free Press but without a date, page or headline.
Rick Perlstein, in a 2005 London Review of Books article and in his 2008 book Nixonland: The Rise of a President and the Fracturing of America (Simon and Schuster, p517 http://books.google.com/books?id=dM_enWzoghoC&pg=PA517#v=onepage&q&f=false), accused Helms of inventing the quote: "They tapped their network of friendly media propagandists, like the future Senator Jesse Helms, then a TV editorialist, who supplied an invented quotation that still circulates as part of the Fonda cult’s liturgy." http://www.lrb.co.uk/v27/n22/rick-perlstein/operation-barbarella The COINTELPRO Papers (2002) documents a separate attempt to plant false quotes from Fonda in the press.
Disputed

“They [Dave Grohl, Krist Novoselic, and Pat Smear] look at me, and you can see they're looking at a ghost. … Dave said, "She is so much like Kurt." They were all talking amongst themselves, rehashing old stories I'd heard a million times. I was sitting in a chair, chain-smoking, looking down like this. [acts bored] And they went, "You are doing exactly what your father would have done."”

Frances Bean Cobain (1992) American artist

" Frances Bean Cobain on Life After Kurt's Death: An Exclusive Q&A http://www.rollingstone.com/music/features/frances-bean-life-after-kurt-cobain-death-exclusive-interview-20150408" (2015)

“[Y]ou must have a clear picture in your mind of what success would look, sound, and feel like.”

David Allen book Getting Things Done

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“You know the way people begin to look like their dogs? Well, we're beginning to look like each other.”

John Lennon (1940–1980) English singer and songwriter

“The weapons room looked exactly the way something called "the weapons room" sounded like it would look.”

Cassandra Clare book City of Bones

Source: City of Bones

“What would a chair look like if your knees bent the other way?”

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Steven Wright 178

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