“Everything was already predestined by God, that is why Jesus saw the people’s ignorance.”

“Everything is predestined in life except the destiny of a man.”

“We do need to be born again, since Jesus said that to a guy named Nicodemus. But if you tell me I have to be born again to enter the Kingdom of God, I can tell you that you have to sell everything you have and give it to the poor, because Jesus said that to one guy, too. But I guess that's why God invented highlighers, so we can highlight the parts we like and ignore the rest.”

“You guys are all into that born again thing, which is great. We do need to be born again, since Jesus said that to a guy named Nicodemus. But if you tell me I have to be born again to enter the kingdom of God, I can tell you that you just have to sell everything you have and give it to the poor, because Jesus said that to one guy too…[And he paused in the awkward silence. ] But I guess that’s why God invented highlighters, so we can highlight the parts we like and ignore the rest.”

“In a dream I saw Jesus and My God Pan sitting together in the heart of the forest.
They laughed at each other's speech, with the brook that ran near them, and the laughter of Jesus was the merrier. And they conversed long.”

“Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replay in sports. They've already forgotten what's happened.”

“When Jesus was nailed to the cross — and hung there in torment - he cried out — "God, my God! Why hast thou forsaken me?"”

“Why couldn't Jesus command us to obsess over everything, to try to control and manipulate people, to try not to breathe at all, or to pay attention, stomp away to brood when people annoy us, and then eat a big bag of Hershey's Kisses in bed?”

“Jesus, man. Why do people want to be Paris Hilton and nobody wants to be Spider-Man?”

“If Jesus truly died for the sins of the people, as our Christian fellows claim, then why are people still dying even today?”