“It was irritating to have one's physical shortcomings pointed out quite so plainly twice in one evening, once by a beautiful girl and once by a dying badger.”

“He once cut one of my nightmares out of paper.
I thought it was beautiful, I put it on a record cover.”

“Not quite what one expected, but once it happened one realized it couldn't be any other way.”

“I once had to dispense with a literary agent because she drank too much. She was very surprised but I pointed out to her, quite logically I thought, that one of us had to be sober and it certainly wan't going to be me.”

“I was in love with a beautiful blonde once, dear. She drove me to drink. That's the one thing I'm so indebted to her for.”

“All of those faeries and duels and mad queens and so on, and no one quoted old Billy Shakespeare. Not even once.”

“Me seemes the world is runne quite out of square,
From the first point of his appointed sourse,
And being once amisse growes daily wourse and wourse.”

“If everyone were not so indolent they would realise that beauty is beauty even when it is irritating and stimulating not only when it is accepted and classic.”

“One loves truly only once in a lifetime, Julian, even if one isn’t aware of it.”

“Just so you know, when they say "once upon a time"…. they're lying. It's not once upon a time. Its not even twice upon a time. It's hundreds of times, over and over, every time someone opens up the pages of this dusty old book.”