“I'd like to make a vending machine that sells vending machines. It'd have to be real fuckin' big!”

— Mitch Hedberg

Mitch All Together (2003)

Adopted from Wikiquote. Last update May 5, 2023. History

Help us to complete the source, original and additional information

Do you have more details about the quote "I'd like to make a vending machine that sells vending machines. It'd have to be real fuckin' big!" by Mitch Hedberg?

Mitch Hedberg photo

Mitch Hedberg101

American stand-up comedian 1968–2005

Related quotes

“Vending machines are a big part of my life. I like when you reach into the vending machine to grab your candy bar and that flap goes up to block you from reaching up. That's a good invention. Before then it was hard times for the vending machine owners, "What candy bar are you getting?", "That one… and every one on the bottom row!"”

Mitch Hedberg (1968–2005) American stand-up comedian

Mitch All Together (2003)

“It's safe to assume that by 2085 guns will be sold in vending machines but you won't be able to smoke anywhere in America.”

David Sedaris When You Are Engulfed in Flames

Source: When You Are Engulfed in Flames

“I like vending machines 'cause snacks are better when they fall. If I buy a candy bar at a store, oftentimes, I will drop it… So that it achieves its maximum flavor potential.”

Mitch Hedberg (1968–2005) American stand-up comedian

Strategic Grill Locations

“Negro equality! Fudge!! How long, in the government of a God, great enough to make and maintain this Universe, shall there continue to be knaves to vend, and fools to gulp, so low a piece of demagougeism as this?”

Abraham Lincoln (1809–1865) 16th President of the United States

Fragments: Notes for Speeches, September 1859, The Collected Works of Abraham Lincoln (1953) Vol. III; No transcripts or reports exist indicating that he ever actually used this expression in any of his speeches.
1850s

“An actress is not a machine, but they treat you like a machine. A money machine.”

Marilyn Monroe (1926–1962) American actress, model, and singer

As quoted in Ms. magazine (August 1972) p. 38

“Consideration has not been given … to this big distinction as to how far men work through machines or as machines.”

Friedrich Wilhelm Schulz (1797–1860) German politician and publisher

Movement of Production (1843), as translated in Economic and Philosophical Manuscripts of 1844 (1988), p. 30

“One of the greatest steps in self-discovery is to see that you are a machine. Only the few who have real knowledge will admit to being machines.”

Barry Long (1926–2003) Australian spiritual teacher and writer

Knowing Yourself: The True in the False (1996)

“It is at work everywhere, functioning smoothly at times, at other times in firs and starts. It breathes, it heats, it eats. It shits and fucks. What a mistake to have ever said the id. Everywhere it is machines- real ones, not figurative ones: machines driving other machines, machines being driven by other machines, with all the necessary couplings and connections. An organ-machine is plugged into an energy-source-machine: the one produces a flow that the other interrupts The breast is a machine that produces miilk, and the mouth a machine coupled to it.”

Gilles Deleuze (1925–1995) French philosopher

The Desiring Machine
Anti-Oedipus Capitalism and Schizophrenia (1977)

“It is at work everywhere, functioning smoothly at times, at other times in fits and starts. It breathes, it heats, it eats. It shits and fucks. What a mistake to have ever said the id. Everywhere it is machines — real ones, not figurative ones: machines driving other machines, machines being driven by other machines, with all the necessary couplings and connections.”

Gilles Deleuze (1925–1995) French philosopher

from Anti-oedipus: capitalism and schizophrenia, p. 1

“Thou shalt not make a machine in the likeness of a human mind.”

Frank Herbert book Dune

Source: Dune

Related topics