“No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.”
"Pointers for Pets".
Social Studies (1981)
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Fran Lebowitz 34
author and public speaker from the United States 1950Related quotes

“The trouble with Michael [Heseltine] is that he had to buy his own furniture”
Attributed by Clark in his diaries to Michael Jopling. The full quote is "An arriviste, certainly, who can't shoot straight and in Jopling's damning phrase 'bought all his own furniture', but who at any rate seeks the cachet. All the nouves in the party think he is the real thing." https://www.theguardian.com/media/2003/aug/07/bbc.politicsandthemedia
Misattributed

“You can keep the dining room clean by eating in the kitchen.”
The Bachelor Home Companion (1986)