“Thank God for tea! What would the world do without tea?—how did it exist? I am glad I was not born before tea.”

“No matter how much makeup I wore, people just kept saying "Yes, sir! Would you like tea with that, sir?" "Yes, I would like tea. Why don't you put it on my breasts?" "Certainly. Tea for this man's breasts! Anything else, sir?"”

“Tea. I find that both settles the stomach and concentrates the mind. Wonderful drink, tea.”

“I am not at all interested in immortality, only in the taste of tea.”

“But indeed I would rather have nothing but tea.”

“The good doctor put a spoon of tea into my honey." "You're drinking tea a honey badger made," Jim said. "What did you expect?”

“He dunked his tea bag and watched the results critically. “I really must get a new supplier. This tea is pathetic. America just doesn’t understand tea at all.”

“Tea! Bless ordinary everyday afternoon tea!”

“When I makes tea I makes tea, as old mother Grogan said. And when I makes water I makes water.”

“Honestly, if you're given the choice between Armageddon or tea, you don't say "what kind of tea?"”