“I read that speaking in front of a crowd is the number-one fear in America. I found that amazing. Number two was death. Number two! That means that, if you're ever at a funeral, you'd rather be in the casket than giving the eulogy.”

— Jerry Seinfeld

I'm Telling You for the Last Time (1998)

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Jerry Seinfeld 52

American comedian and actor 1954

Sidney Sheldon (1917–2007) American writer

“And we hold these truths to be self-evident:
Number one-- George W. Bush is not president.
Number two-- America is not a true democracy.
And, Number three-- the media is not fooling me.”

Ani DiFranco (1970) musician and activist

Self-Evident
Song lyrics

“Look out for number one and try not to step in number two.”

Rodney Dangerfield (1921–2004) American actor and comedian

“He could remember the idiosyncrasies of numbers in an almost uncanny way. It was Littlewood who said that every positive integer was one of Ramanujan's personal friends. I remember once going to see him when he was ill at Putney. I had ridden in taxi cab number 1729 and remarked that the number seemed to me rather a dull one, and that I hoped it was not an unfavorable omen. "No," he replied, "it is a very interesting number; it is the smallest number expressible as the sum of two cubes in two different ways."”

G. H. Hardy (1877–1947) British mathematician

Source: Ramanujan (1940), Ch. I : The Indian mathematician Ramanujan.

“I discovered two very important facts that day - Number one: The springs will pull the hair out of your legs, and Number two: the dog doesn't like to jump.”

Bill Engvall (1957) American comedian and actor

about trampolines
Source: Blue Collar Comedy Tour, Blue Collar Comedy Tour: One For the Road (2006)

“The real alternative to being Number One is not being Number Two; it is dispensing with rankings altogether”

Alfie Kohn (1957) American author and lecturer

No Contest, chap. 9

“The bodies of which the world is composed are solids, and therefore have three dimensions. Now, three is the most perfect number,—it is the first of numbers, for of one we do not speak as a number, of two we say both, but three is the first number of which we say all.”

Aristotle (-384–-321 BC) Classical Greek philosopher, student of Plato and founder of Western philosophy

Moreover, it has a beginning, a middle, and an end.
I. 1. as translated by William Whewell and as quoted by Florian Cajori, A History of Physics in its Elementary Branches (1899) as Aristotle's proof that the world is perfect.
On the Heavens