“So Aphrodite married Hephaestus and the celebrity ship Aphrophaestus completely dominated Olympian tabloid news for like a thousand years. Did they live happily ever after? HAHAHAHAHA. No.”

“Is not where I live happily ever after, or who with. It's the fact that I live happily ever after.”

“What did a happy ending even mean in real life, anyway? In stories you simply said, 'They lived happily ever after,' and that was it. But in real life people had to keep on living, day after day, year after year.”

“And will I tell you that these three lived happily ever after? I will not, for no one ever does. But there was happiness. And they did live.”

“And so, with laughter and love, we lived happily ever after.”

“You know how some celebrities have fans of the opposite sex, who imagine they’re going to marry them and live happily ever after? I have a different thing. Over the past 15 years I’ve had a few female fans who’ve gone overboard and been upset because we didn’t become best friends and go shopping together.”

“I think we ought to live happily ever after.”

“It is only possible to live happily ever after on a daily basis.”

“That means life itself is a fairy tale. Like the characters, we all live and love and search for a happily-ever-after.”

“Rocks are like wreck magnets and ships run aground today in pretty much the same locations and for the same reasons they did thousands of years ago.”