“It's probably a bad indicator of your lifestyle when you miss your ex-boyfriend because he's absolutely lethal.”

“Nick as in my former boyfriend Nick. Ex-rat, ex-boyfriend, ex-alive if I ever got hold of him Nick.”

“You either make business your lifestyle, or business becomes your lifestyle.”

“Okay," Juke said. "Your horse is a donkey, your poodle is a giant wolf breed, and your boyfriend is whatever the hell he is. You have problems.”

“Hell is other actors,” Kirsten said. “Also ex-boyfriends.”

“You can’t really yell at your boyfriend for stealing your seat and your best friend. You also can’t yell at your best friend for stealing your boyfriend. Or you can…but Hi seemed like a much easier way to start the morning.”

“Your boyfriend's dead. Thought you should know.”

“You can clear out whatever obstacles are preventing you from living your most creative life, with the simple understanding that whatever is bad for you is probably also bad for your work.”

“Interviewer: Do you guys really live the lifestyle that you sing about in your songs?
El Duce: Absolutely. All our songs are about reality. Like Sleep Bandits.”

“Who gets the change?" the clerk asked. "You or… your fella?"
Oh, he's not my boyfriend," I said. "He's my mother.”