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Scott Adams Quotes
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Scott Raymond Adams is the creator of the Dilbert comic strip, and the author of several nonfiction works of satire, commentary, and business.

His Dilbert series came to national prominence through the downsizing period in 1990s America and was then distributed worldwide. Adams worked in various roles at big businesses before he became a full-time cartoonist in 1995. He writes in a satirical, often sarcastic way about the social and psychological landscape of white-collar workers in modern business corporations. Wikipedia  

✵ 8. June 1957   •   Other names سكوت آدامز, 史考特·亞當斯
Scott Adams photo
Scott Adams: 86   quotes 4   likes

Scott Adams Quotes

“Communism is the most painful path between capitalism and capitalism.”

Scott Adams

Dilbert https://dilbert.com/strip/1989-12-12, Tuesday December 12, 1989

Pain , Communication

“Much of politics is about hating imaginary people.”

Scott Adams

[Twitter, 8 August 2021, https://twitter.com/ScottAdamsSays/status/1424352326177853442]
Miscellaneous

Hate , People

“People think they follow advice but they don't. Humans are only capable of receiving information. They create their own advice. If you seek to influence someone, don't waste time giving advice. You can change only what people know, not what they do.”

Scott Adams book God's Debris

Source: Books, God's Debris (2001)

People , Change , Time , Thinking

“If you're going to create, create a lot. Creativity is not like playing the slot machines, where failure to win means you go home broke. With creativity, if you don't win, you're usually no worse off than if you hadn't played.”

Scott Adams book The Joy of Work

Source: Books, The Joy of Work (1998)

Home , Failure

“Creativity doesn't require much time. But creativity always needs your energy. You can't create if you're pooped or your brain is full of junk. A person who manages creativity makes sure his schedule has lots of free spaces, no matter how many priorities are looming.”

Scott Adams book The Joy of Work

Source: Books, The Joy of Work (1998)

Personality , Time

“Trying to win an argument with an irrational person is like trying to teach a cat to snorkel by providing written instructions. No matter how clear your instructions, it won't work. Your best strategy is to reduce the time you spend in that sort of situation.”

Scott Adams book The Joy of Work

Source: Books, The Joy of Work (1998)

Personality , Cats , Time

“Never laugh when you're being sarcastic. It will ruin the effect. If you feel the uncontrollable need to giggle, wait until your boss says something hilarious, such as, "Is this only Wednesday? It feels like Friday already!"”

Scott Adams book The Joy of Work

Source: Then you can throw back your head, open your mouth like you're about to swallow a live porpoise, and laugh like a naked teenager in a field full of pussy willows. Sincerity like that will make your sarcasm all the more convincing.
Source: Books, The Joy of Work (1998)

Waiting , Feeling

“Thinking is easier than working. And the best kind of thinking is the kind where you don't have to write anything down, i.e., "meeting thinking." When you think up an idea during a meeting, all you have to do is blurt it out. You won't have to involve any parts of your body except your mouth and maybe your brain stem.”

Scott Adams book The Joy of Work

Source: Books, The Joy of Work (1998)

Idea , Thinking , Parting

“It's illegal to kill yourself in a quick and painless way, but if you do it slowly over a few decades -- say by not exercising -- that's called laziness, not suicide, and it's completely legal. You might even get credit for being jolly or get a job as a TV chef on a cable network.”

Scott Adams

Source: Books, Dilbert and the Way of the Weasel (2002)

Way , Suicide , Exercises

“People who have children have the best work-avoidance excuses in the world. If you don't have kids, get some immediately. The playgrounds are full of them.”

Scott Adams

Source: Books, Dilbert and the Way of the Weasel (2002)

Children , People , World

“I predict that news outlets will try to compensate for the loss of relevant news by focusing on stories that are more shocking and depressing than ever. At least that way they'll get your attention and sell advertising even if the stories aren't "news" in the traditional sense.”

Scott Adams

Source: Books, The Dilbert Future (1997)

Sense , Loss , Way

“Rich guys used to be able to manipulate the stock market and make huge profits at the expense of smaller investors. It was big news when the small investors discovered they'd been screwed. Now there are many safeguards against the small investor ever finding out how much he's getting screwed.”

Scott Adams

Source: Books, The Dilbert Future (1997)

Guy

“Technology magnifies the ability of one person to have a big impact on other people. If that doesn't scare you, then the next time you see professional wrestling on television, look at the crowd shots and ask yourself if you'd like those people to have a bigger impact on your life.”

Scott Adams

Source: Books, The Dilbert Future (1997)

Personality , People , Time , Life

“People don't change their basic nature, they just accumulate more stuff upon which they can apply their stupidity, selfishness, and horniness. From this perspective, the future isn't hard to predict.”

Scott Adams

Source: Books, The Dilbert Future (1997)

Selfishness , Future , People , Nature

“When we are born, all humans are clueless, self-absorbed, and helpless. Most babies will grow out of it. Those who don't become managers.”

Scott Adams

Source: Books, Dogbert's Top Secret Management Handbook (1996)

Baby