He asked if it had a name, and I said “Indianapolis.”
God Bless You, Dr. Kevorkian (1999)
Kurt Vonnegut: Trending quotes (page 13)
Kurt Vonnegut trending quotes. Read the latest quotes in collectionSource: The Sirens of Titan (1959), Chapter 3 “United Hotcake Preferred” (p. 72)
The People One Knows
Palm Sunday (1981)
“And a step backward, after making a wrong turn, is a step in the right direction.”
Source: Player Piano (1952), Chapter 32 (p. 295)
“If you actually are an educated, thinking person, you will not be welcome in Washington DC.”
A Man Without a Country (2005)
Originates in a 2007 blog post by Iain S. Thomas entitled The Fur http://www.iwrotethisforyou.me/2007/08/fur.html
Misattributed
Source: The Sirens of Titan (1959), Chapter 3 “United Hotcake Preferred” (p. 78)
Hocus Pocus (1990)
Source: Player Piano (1952), Chapter 9 (p. 88)
“Things don't stay the way they are," said Finnerty. "It's too entertaining to try to change them.”
Source: Player Piano (1952), Chapter 34 (p. 313)
“All persons, living and dead, are purely coincidental.”
Timequake (1997)
Galápagos (1985)
Context: Mere opinions, in fact, were as likely to govern people's actions as hard evidence, and were subject to sudden reversals as hard evidence could never be. So the Galapagos Islands could be hell in one moment and heaven in the next, and Julius Caesar could be a statesman in one moment and a butcher in the next, and Ecuadorian paper money could be traded for food, shelter, and clothing in one moment and line the bottom of a birdcage in the next, and the universe could be created by God Almighty in one moment and by a big explosion in the next — and on and on.
Cold Turkey (2004)
Context: I have to say this in defense of humankind: No matter in what era in history, including the Garden of Eden, everybody just got there. And, except for the Garden of Eden, there were already all these crazy games going on, which could make you act crazy, even if you weren’t crazy to begin with. Some of the games that were already going on when you got here were love and hate, liberalism and conservatism, automobiles and credit cards, golf and girls’ basketball.
Even crazier than golf, though, is modern American politics, where, thanks to TV and for the convenience of TV, you can only be one of two kinds of human beings, either a liberal or a conservative.
Breakfast of Champions (1973)
Context: I was on par with the Creator of the Universe there in the dark in the cocktail lounge. I shrunk the Universe to a ball exactly one light-year in diameter. I had it explode. I had it disperse itself again.
Ask me a question, any question. How old is the Universe? It is one half-second old, but the half-second has lasted one quintillion years so far. Who created it? Nobody created it. It has always been here.
What is time? It is a serpent which eats its tail, like this:
This is the snake which uncoiled itself long enough to offer Eve the apple, which looked like this:
What was the apple which Eve and Adam ate? It was the Creator of the Universe.
And so on.
Symbols can be so beautiful, sometimes.
“When the excrement hit the air conditioner”
Recurring phrase throughout many chapters
Hocus Pocus (1990)
Mother Night (1961)
Context: "You hate America, don't you?" she said.
"That would be as silly as loving it," I said. "It's impossible for me to get emotional about it, because real estate doesn't interest me. It's no doubt a great flaw in my personality, but I can't think in terms of boundaries. Those imaginary lines are as unreal to me as elves and pixies. I can't believe that they mark the end or the beginning of anything of real concern to the human soul. Virtues and vices, pleasures and pains cross boundaries at will."
“Human beings are chimpanzees who get crazy drunk on power.”
Cold Turkey (2004)
Context: Human beings are chimpanzees who get crazy drunk on power. By saying that our leaders are power-drunk chimpanzees, am I in danger of wrecking the morale of our soldiers fighting and dying in the Middle East? Their morale, like so many bodies, is already shot to pieces. They are being treated, as I never was, like toys a rich kid got for Christmas.
“Labor history was pornography of a sort in those days, and even more so in these days.”
Source: Jailbird (1979), p. 12 (prologue)
Context: Labor history was pornography of a sort in those days, and even more so in these days. In public schools and in the homes of nice people it was and remains pretty much taboo to tell tales of labor's sufferings and derring-do.