Dorothy Parker: Trending quotes

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Dorothy Parker: 344 quotes28 likes

“Four be the things I'd have been better without: love, curiosity, freckles and doubt.”

“I was always sweet, at first. Oh, it's so easy to be sweet to people before you love them.”

Source: Collected Stories

“Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studded
wheelchair.”

“Women and elephants never forget.”

“Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away.”

“Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.”

16 August 1925
Enough Rope (1926)

“But I don't give up; I forget why not.”

“I'd like to have money. And I'd like to be a good writer. These two can come together, and I hope they will, but if that's too adorable, I'd rather have money.”

“A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika.”

“The sun's gone dim, and the moon's gone black. For I loved him, and he didn't love back.”

“I might repeat to myself, slowly and soothingly, a list of quotations beautiful from minds profound; if I can remember any of the damn things.”

"The Little Hours" in Here Lies (1939)
Source: Here Lies: The Collected Stories of Dorothy Parker

“Q: What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?

A: You can't hear an enzyme.”

“You think You're frightening me with Your hell, don't You? You think Your hell is worse than mine.”

Source: The Portable Dorothy Parker

“Three be the things I shall never attain:
Envy, content, and sufficient champagne.”

Source: The Portable Dorothy Parker

“His voice was as intimate as the rustle of sheets.”

“There was nothing separate about her days. Like drops on the window-pane, they ran together and trickled away.”

“If all the girls attending [the Yale prom] were laid end to end, I wouldn't be at all surprised.”

Our Mrs Parker (1934)
Source: While Rome Burns
Context: And there was that wholesale libel on a Yale prom. If all the girls attending it were laid end to end, Mrs Parker said, she wouldn't be at all surprised.

“I like best to have one book in my hand, and a stack of others on the floor beside me, so as to know the supply of poppy and mandragora will not run out before the small hours.”

Source: The Collected Dorothy Parker

“You can't teach an old dogma new tricks.”

Source: Attributed to Parker after her death, by Robert E. Drennan The Algonquin Wits (1968), p. 124. However the same quip appears anonymously fifteen years earlier, in the trade journal Sales Management (Chicago: Dartnell Corp., 1918-75), vol. 70 (Survey of Buying Power, 1953), p. 80: "Marxism never changes. You can’t teach an old dogma new tricks."

“She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B.”