Christopher Moore: Trending quotes

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Christopher Moore: 268 quotes0 likes

“If there was anything I learned from John the Baptist, it was that the sooner you confess a mistake, the quicker you can get on to making new and better mistakes.”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Source: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

“Praying is talking to God. Meditating is listening.”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Source: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

“Enchantment and seduction were fine means of persuasion, but when time is short, an awkward but quick concussion could better serve a girl's purpose.”

Christopher Moore

Source: Sacre Bleu: A Comedy d Art

“I fear you may become a lonely man, even in the company of others.”

Christopher Moore book Fool

Source: Fool

“Inside, I was like: "Ha, suck my spiky rubber strap-on, vampyre hunter!”

Christopher Moore

Source: You Suck

“You're going to break my heart, aren't you?”

Christopher Moore book Bloodsucking Fiends

Source: Bloodsucking Fiends

“Unless you can change the past, you’re wasting the present on this guilt”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Source: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

“Yo, yo, yo, check it out," said PJ, with enough hand gestures that any deaf person watching would have thought he had ASL Tourette's syndrome”

Christopher Moore

Source: You Suck

“Compliment but do not covet.”

Christopher Moore

“Fornication with your daughters thats like a double dog sin.”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal (2002)

“You should feel what it is like to pleasure a falcon. You lock talons with her in the sky and do it while you both are falling like meteors. You would like it; they never complain if you come too fast.”

Christopher Moore book Coyote Blue

Coyote Blue (1994)

“Tension among a bunch of neurotics is just more interesting for a story than is a description of dedicated professionals doing their work and getting along, which is the case in reality. When in doubt, assume I made it up.”

Christopher Moore book Fluke, or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings

Author's notes : Science and Magic
Fluke, or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings (2003)

“I fink I gots deaf on me willie.”

Christopher Moore book Fool

Drool, Ch 14 - On Tender Horns - pg 170
Fool (2009)

“When the oil of the lamp is used up the wanker shall light his own way to salvation.”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal (2002)

“Mary: You can read?
Pocket: I was raised in a nunnery, wench. I'm a walking library of learning bound in comely leather, suitable for stroking at your service, should you fancy a bit of culture to go with your lack of breeding…or vice verse of course.”

Christopher Moore book Fool

Fool (2009)

“And so that is the story of how St. Rufus of Pipewrench was licked to death by marmots.”

Christopher Moore book Fool

Thalia
Fool (2009)

“The Ghost: I'm sorry to haunt you while you're rogering the help.
Pocket: The rogering has not commenced, wisp. I have barely bridled the horse for a moist and bawdy ride. Now, go away!”

Christopher Moore book Fool

Fool (2009)

“Regardless of its purpose, the humpback-whale song is the most complex piece of nonhuman composition on earth. Whether it's art, prayer, or booty call, the humpback song is an amazing thing to experience firsthand, and I suspect that even once the science of it is put to bed, it will remain, as long as they sing, magic.”

Christopher Moore book Fluke, or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings

Author's notes : Science and Magic
Fluke, or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings (2003)

“Moses should have said "Let my people go. Please."”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Josh (Jesus)
Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal (2002)