Christopher Moore: Trending quotes

“If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them.”

“Children see magic because they look for it.”

“Stephenie Meyer: Her vampires are sparkly, which I think we can all agree is wrong.”

“Nobody's perfect. Well, there was this one guy, but we killed him….”

“It's wildly irritating to have invented something as revolutionary as sarcasm, only to have it abused by amateurs.”

“Don't be ridiculous, Charlie, people love the parents who beat their kids in department stores. It's the ones who just let their kids wreak havoc that everybody hates.”

“Blessed are the dumbfucks.”

“There's some heinous fuckery goin' on mon.”

“Love: the sickest of Irony’s sick jokes. The place where logic and order go to die.”

“That's the difference between irony and sarcasm. Irony can be spontaneous, while sarcasm requires volition. You have to create sarcasm.”

“I love you above all things, even pie.”

“Not unlike the toaster, I control darkness.”

“She's so small, yet she contains so much evil.”

“Love needs room to grow. Like a rose. Or a tumor.”

“Canada is a myth people made up to entertain children, like the Tooth Fairy. There’s no such place.”

“Only cops and vampires have to have an invitation to enter.”

“You think you know how this story is going to end, but you don't. Trust me, I was there. I know.”

“There's a fine edge to new grief, it severs nerves, disconnects reality--there's mercy in a sharp blade. Only with time, as the edge wears, does the real ache begin.”

“Boredom can be a lethal thing on a small island.”