Christopher Moore: Trending quotes

Christopher Moore trending quotes. Read the latest quotes in collection
Christopher Moore: 268 quotes0 likes

“So I am death" Charlie said then turned to his daughter while buttering his toast.

"This is death toast sweety.”

Christopher Moore book A Dirty Job

Source: A Dirty Job

“Heinous fuckery most foul!”

Christopher Moore book Fool

Source: Pocket (Black Fool)

“… as if someone had thrown a hand grenade into the middle of a teddy bear orgy and the only survivors had had their fur blown off.”

Christopher Moore

Source: You Suck

“King Lear: What is your name?
Kent / Caius: Caius.
King Lear: And whence do you hale?
Kent / Caius: From Bonking, Sire.
King Lear: Well, yes, lad as do we all.”

Christopher Moore book Fool

Source: Fool (2009)

“Blessed are the meek, for to them we shall say "attaboy".”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Source: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

“May the IRS find that you deduct your pet sheep as an entertainment expense.”

Christopher Moore book Practical Demonkeeping

Author's Blessing
Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal (2002)
Source: Practical Demonkeeping
Context: If you have come to these pages for laughter, may you find it.
If you are here to be offended, may your ire rise and your blood boil.
If you seek an adventure, may this song sing you away to blissful escape.
If you need to test or confirm your beliefs, may you reach comfortable conclusions.
All books reveal perfection, by what they are or what they are not.
May you find that which you seek, in these pages or outside them.
May you find perfection, and know it by name.

“She doesn't understand that a writer is a special creature--that I'm different from everyone else. I'm not saying I'm superior to other people, just more sensitive, I guess.”

Christopher Moore book Bloodsucking Fiends

Source: Bloodsucking Fiends

“The angel has confided in me that he is going to ask the Lord if he can become Spider-Man. […] The children need heroes, he says. I think he just wants to swing from buildings in tight red jammies.”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Source: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

“Love? Sodding, bloody, tossing, bloody, sodding, bloody love? Irrelevant, superfluous, bloody, ruddy, rotten, sodding love? What ho? Wherefore? What the f*ck? Love?”

Christopher Moore book Fool

Source: Fool

“Like most Beta Males, he didn't realize that being a good guy was not necessarily an attraction to women.”

Christopher Moore book A Dirty Job

Source: A Dirty Job

“It's like time travel only, you know, slower…”

Christopher Moore

“It turns out that one can perpetrate all manner of heinous villainy under a cloak of courtesy and good cheer… a man will forfeit all sensible self-interest if he finds you affable enough to share your company over a flagon of ale.”

Christopher Moore book Fool

Source: Fool

“He has the attention span of a hummingbird.”

Christopher Moore

Source: The Stupidest Angel: A Heartwarming Tale of Christmas Terror

“The netherworld is timeless and unchanging, and boring -- much like a doctor's waiting room.”

Christopher Moore book Practical Demonkeeping

Source: Practical Demonkeeping

“Oh, we are but soft and squishy bags of mortality rolling in a bin of sharp circumstance, leaking life until we collapse, flaccid, into our own despair..”

Christopher Moore book Fool

Source: Fool

“… but to remain historically accurate, I would have had to leave out an important question that I felt needed to be addressed, which is, 'What if Jesus had known kung fu?”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Source: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

“She was an alien, really - a sort of eating, pooping, tantrum machine - and he didn't understand anything about her species.”

Christopher Moore