Christopher Moore: Trending quotes

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Christopher Moore: 268 quotes0 likes

“The Science you don't know looks like magic.”

Christopher Moore book Fluke, or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings

Kona, in Ch. 30
Fluke, or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings (2003)

“The problem with being nuts, she thought, is that you don't always feel as if you're nuts. Sometimes, in fact, you feel perfectly sane, and there just happens to be a trailer-shaped dragon crouching in the lot next door.”

Christopher Moore

“Actually, orcas aren't quite as complex as scientists imagine. Most killer whales are just four tons of doofus dressed up like a police car.”

Christopher Moore

Source: Fluke: Or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings

“Christmas crept into Pine Cove like a creeping Christmas thing: dragging garland, ribbon, and sleigh bells, oozing eggnog, reeking of pine, and threatening festive doom like a cold sore under the mistletoe.”

Christopher Moore

Source: The Stupidest Angel: A Heartwarming Tale of Christmas Terror

“It's very difficult to stay angry when a room full of bald guys in orange robes start giggling. Buddhism.”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Source: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

“It's hard for me, a Jew, to stay in the moment. Without the past, where is the guilt? And without the future, where is the dread? And without guilt and dread, who am I?”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Source: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

“She knew it should bother her more, being evil and all, but after she put on a little mascara and some lipstick and poured herself another cup of blood-laced coffee, she found that she was okay with it.”

Christopher Moore

Source: You Suck

“He invented Kung Fu when translated to English means method by which short, bald guys can kick the bejeezus out of you.”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Source: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

“You're trying to be tricky. What's morality?"
"It's the difference between what's right and what you can rationalize."
"Must be a human thing."
"Exactly.”

Christopher Moore

“Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry, you can't have a baby brother, because that would mean that Daddy had sex, and that's never going to happen again.”

Christopher Moore book A Dirty Job

Source: A Dirty Job

“This story is not and never was meant to challenge anyone's faith; however, if one's faith can be shaken by stories in a humorous novel, one may have a bit more praying to do.”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Source: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

“He was a writer and words were his weapons.”

Christopher Moore book Bloodsucking Fiends

Source: Bloodsucking Fiends

“Oh, I get it," I said. "It's a parable. Cute. Let's go eat.”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Source: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

“I've won Satan's lottery.”

Christopher Moore book Bloodsucking Fiends

Source: Bloodsucking Fiends

“The Emperor decided to make a proclamation to his troops about the importance of compassion in the face of the rising tide of heinous fuckery and political weaselocity in the nearby kingdom of the United States.”

Christopher Moore book A Dirty Job

Source: A Dirty Job

“Routine feeds the illusion of safety…”

Christopher Moore book Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Source: Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

“Everyone is happier if they have someone else to look down on, as well as someone to look up to, especially if they resent both.”

Christopher Moore book A Dirty Job

Source: A Dirty Job

“There's always a bloody ghost.”

Christopher Moore book Fool

Source: Fool