Bill Watterson: Trending quotes (page 6)

“I like maxims that don't encourage behavior modification.
-Calvin”

“Leave it to a girl to take all the fun out of sex discrimination.
-Calvin”

“You can present the material, but you can't make me care.”

“Calvin is hammering nails into coffee table.
Mom: CALVIN WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO THE COFFEE TABLE?!?
Calvin: Is this some sort of trick question, or what?”

“I keep forgetting that rules are only for little nice people.”

“Often it takes some calamity to make us live in the present. Then suddenly we wake up and see all the mistakes we have made.”

“Calvin: Dad where do babies come from?
Dad: Well Calvin, you simply go to Sears, buy the kit and follow the assembly instructions.
Calvin: I came from Sears?
Dad: No you were a blue-light special at K-Mart - almost as good and a lot cheaper!”

“Everybody I know fails the acid test of friendship.”

“Calvin: Happiness is being famous for your financial ability to indulge in every kind of excess.
p35”

“At school, new ideas are thrust at you every day. Out in the world, you'll have to find your inner motivation to seek for new ideas on your own.”

“Calvin: As you can see, I have memorized this utterly useless piece of information long enough to pass a test question. I now intend to forget it forever. You've taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the system. Congratulations.
p.90”

“CALVIN:
Our hero regains consciousness at the feet of a sarcastic alien.”

“Specifically, I’d like to debate whether cannibalism ought to be grounds for leniency in murders, since it’s less wasteful.”

“Life is full of surprises, but never when you need one.”

“It's a magical world, Hobbes, ol' buddy… Let's go exploring!”

“The problem with people is that they're only human.”

“I'm crying because out there he's gone, but he's not gone inside me.”

“Hey Susie Derkins, is that your face, or is a 'possum stuck in your collar?”

“Calvin: But Calvin is no kind and loving god! He's one of the old gods! He demands sacrifice!
p99”