Andy Rooney: Quotes about life

Andy Rooney was writer, humorist, television personality. Explore interesting quotes on life.
Andy Rooney: 50   quotes 24   likes

“It's paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn't appeal to anyone.”

Andy Rooney
Life , Idea

“I've learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.”

Andy Rooney
Life , Learning

“It's a sad day at 60 Minutes and for everybody here at CBS News. It's hard to imagine not having Andy around. He loved his life and he lived it on his own terms. We will miss him very much.”

Andy Rooney

Jeff Fager — quoted in CBS News, Andy Rooney dead at 92, November 5, 2011, CBS, October 31, 2013 http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-18560_162-57319150/andy-rooney-dead-at-92/,
About

Love , Life , Sadness , Imagination

“I want to live my next life backwards: You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in a nursing home feeling better every day. Then you get kicked out for being too healthy. Enjoy your retirement and collect your pension. Then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work 40 years until you're too young to work. You get ready for High School: drink alcohol, party, and you're generally promiscuous. Then you go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, and you have no responsibilities. Then you become a baby, and then… You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, in spa-like conditions - central heating, room service on tap, and then… You finish off as an orgasm.”

Andy Rooney

Variations of this piece have been misattributed to Andy Rooney, George Carlin, and Woody Allen. The original source is a variation on a piece by Sean Morey. ( "snopes.com: Andy Rooney on Everything", Snopes.com, 2012-09-09 http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/rooney3.asp, )
Misattributed

Life , Alcohol , School , Way